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 Holabird AdvocateProviding all the news we see fit to print since 2002!Monday, June 30, 2003 VOL. II Issue 6Q LONG GOODBYE FOR PASTOR PHIL The Highmore United Methodist Church played host to the BHH Parish Farewell service and potluck dinner for Pastor Phil Lint yesterday. It was a packed house.There was an almost tearjerking children's serrmon when Pator Phil said "Goodbye" to each of the kids in attendance individually. Suprisingly enough none of the kids cried, in fact they took it better than a lot of the adults. He also made sure that each of the kids had his address, so that they could write to him to let him know how they were doing as they grew. Pastor Phil thanked the parish for all of their love and support and blessings. He also challenged the parish to be faithful in their giving, especially when it's a special offering. He further hoped that when they were supplied with another minister, that they treat him or her the same wonderful way that they have treated him through the years. Different members of the BHH Parish showered him with all matter of gifts and cards of good wishes. Pastor Phil was sorry that his wife Mary Lee was not able to come because of a previous commitment and added her thanks to his own as well. The parish churches at Wagner and Tyndall are getting a good minister in Pastor Phil Lint. All of us at the Holabird Advocate hope they know that. HEPBURN AND TRACY-TOGETHER AGAIN This morning it was reported that Katharine Hepburn has died at the age of 96. Ms. Hepburn had made several motion pictures, frequently teaming up with Spencer Tracy. She won four Academy Awards, but refused to attend the ceremony because as she said " I might lose". Holabird Advocate Publisher, Jerry Hinkle, has only one Hepburn movie in his video library, "Rooster Cogburn (...and the Lady)". She played the Lady (of course), and did so with all the comedic and dramatic timing at the points that the challenging role called for her to do so. She did that with all of her roles. Her pathos in "On Golden Pond" was so convincing, that some people were sure that she was, in fact, married to Henry Fonda (she wasn't). Perhaps the aspiring actress of today should go out and rent a few of her movies and see how "it" is done. THE PUBLISHER'S NOTES by Jerry Hinkle (natch) Just a few quick notes to close of the 18th issue of the Holabird Advocate. First of all, to all the concerned readers out there concerned about my finances, don't be. I'm a little cash poor right now because I've got a lot invested in Market America products right now. Now, as for the $35 for the camping trip, I'll either raise it or I won't. To answer another burning question, yes, I want to take this trip because Stephanie Herseth will be there, but only because I'd like to interview her face to face. I'm not interested in Ms. Herseth in any other way (besides that, she wouldn't have me anyhow) Another little hicup with the Newsblog is that the IRS is not happy with the masthead declaring that it is a non-profit organization. They say that people could be confused and give us money for tax deduction purposes. For that reason we can not call the Holabird Advocate a non-profit corportion. The reason it is not tax deductable is because, according to the IRS, we werve no charitable purpose (ridding the world of ignorance is not a charitable purpose, I guess). Since there would be a lot of expense and red tape involved in fighting the whole thing, I decided it best just to change the masthead. Starting with our 19th issue tomorrow, I will add a discussion thread module, what I call a "letter to the Publisher" where you the reader can give both positive and negative feedback to what I am doing here. You can even debate vital social issues and stuff with each other (which should be more interesting than the "Point-Counterpoint" thing that Dole and Clinton-Clinton and Dole gave us on "60 Minutes". My birthday is July 18th, I will be 36. I am hoping that by that day we will have 1700 readers, which is the population of Hyde County. If you know anyone who would enjoy this kind of infotainment (or is it entermaition) please get them directed to us. We'll thank you and they will too. Lastly, I want to let you, the Readers, know how humble I've felt the last month with your responses to this month's poll. There have been times in the last 18 months that I haven't felt courageous or dynamic. It is usually while I am at the computer at the home office here, cranking out the Holabird Advocate editions for you, the Reader, that do feel that way. For that I thank you. Saturday, June 28, 2003 VOL. II Issue 6P HAROLD HINKLE TO START CALL LIST Just when the Federal government starts a "Do Not Call" list, Harold Hinkle is looking for people to be on a "Do Call" list. It seems he has too much free time and free minutes on his cellular phone. He has been calling up a storm here. Victums this week alone include both of Harold's sisters, all three of his uncles, an aunt, his cousins, Donna Wallis and Ellene Farley, and even his old army pals, Maurice Ham and Dale Verconde. Nobody seems to be off limits. If there are any Holabird Advocate readers out there who have nothing to do on the weekend or after 9pm Holabird time, feel free to be placed on his "Do Call" list. If you would not like to ever be called by Harold in this lifetime or the next, you can get placed on a "Do Not Call" list as well. E-mail your request to mhhink@sbtc.net with "Do Call list" or "Do Not Call" list, depending on your own unique situation, in the subject line. Be sure to let him know your name, number and the times you are available. Harold's record is 2 hours so make sure that if you do get a call that you will be comfortable, as you will be there for a while. INSURANCE RISK POOL CREATED All three bills introduced in the special session that Governor Mike Rounds called on Thursday were passed by the Statehouse and signed into law yesterday before noon. The bills consisted of two Senate Bills and one House Bill. The first Senate Bill created the risk pool, while the other bill paid for it out of the general fund, thereby not calling for a tax increase. The House Bill called for flexible rates for the insurance companies that have seen fit to stay in the state of South Dakota. This risk pool was created for the 1000 uninsured people in South Dakota who were left without insurance when their carrier stopped doing business in the state. KENNY ROGERS TIX ARE SELLING FAST The South Dakota State Fair has announced that well over half of the tickets for the Kenny Rogers concert at 8pm July 30 have been sold. In addition to the Kenny Rogers show there will be a concert from the Georgia Satellites (a group we've heard of) and Rude awakening (a group we've never heard of, must be the openning act). That concert will be at 8pm on August 2. Other grandstand shows include the "Rock and Roll Revival" and an AMA motorcycle race on August 3, just one day before the legendary Sturgis Rally and Races is to begin. Last but certainly not least, in order to bring kids to the fair, it has been announced that Sesame Street's Elmo will be at the fair as well. Because of security concerns Elmo's exact venue was not disclosed. BHH SAYS "FAREWELL" TO PASTOR PHIL JUNE 29 Pastor Phil Lint will have his last rervice for the BHH parish at Highmore tomorrow at 10:30am with a potluck dinner to follow. He has been a loyal and faithful servant to the three congragations and will be severely missed. Pastor Phil is going on to better things in the Tyndall, South Dakota area. Everyone here at the Holabird Advocate wishes him and his wife Mary Lee well. Friday, June 27, 2003 VOL. II Issue 6O STROM THURMOND DIES AT 100 Former Senator and 1948 presidential candidate Strom Thurmond died at an Edgefield, South Carolina hospital last night. He was 100 years old. Sen. Thurmond served in the Senate for a record 48 years. His 25 hour filibuster was another record that has yet to be broken. Much has been made of his Dixiecrat segregationalist record, but since is death, politicians and media alike have gone out of their way to say good things about him. Yes, the same media that had a collective cow when Trent Lott paid him tribute are now joining in. It should be noted that Thurmond was a Democrat when he supported segregation. As a Republican, he helped to dismantle it the moment it was no longer the law of the land. Does this mean that Trent Lott will be allowed to take his rightful place in the Majority leadership back? Not likely. For that, all of the hypocrites in the media and the government will pay. Someday they will all pay. SPECIAL SESSION TO LOOK AT RISK POOL South Dakota Governor mike Rounds called a special session of the Legislators to create a risk pool. The risk pool that Gov. Mike Rounds hopes will protect people with costly medical problems and stop health-insurance companies from leaving South Dakota. The Senate approved of the risk pool in a unanimous vote. The risk pool is one piece of a three-bill package that Rounds called lawmakers into the special session to consider. It requires House approval today to become law. The House also will look at a Senate-passed bill today that funds the risk pool. The risk pool would provide insurance for some 1,000 South Dakotans who have lost coverage for their expensive medical problems because their insurance carrier stopped doing business in the state, and no other company was willing to pick up the risk. The program includes the following: • Health insurance companies would fund part of the cost of the risk pool by paying $3 per year for each person they cover. • Doctors and hospitals would take lower rates, 15 percent above Medicaid levels, to reduce the cost of care for those in the pool. • Insurance agents would take lower commissions, 3 percent instead of normal charges of as much as 10 percent. • The state would commit $500,000 in general funds for ongoing support and budget savings to create a $1.5 million reserve fund. • Those in the pool would pay premiums that averaged 150 percent of the rate for a healthy person of the same classifications. Governor Rounds opened the special session by telling the lawmakers that without a risk pool for uninsurable citizens, companies that write individual health policies will continue to leave the state, threatening the ability of thousands of other citizens to get coverage and making it all the more difficult for the state to attract new companies and industries. "It's not the 1,000 people we have to focus on," Rounds said in a session-opening message to a joint House-Senate meeting. "The fact is that if we take care of those 1,000 individuals ... we've assured ourselves that the remaining individuals currently covered by the market will be able to have insurance coverage remaining within the state." "The publicity on this issue is going to suggest we're opening up a plan for uninsured. This is not the case," he said. "This doesn't solve the whole health-insurance problem in South Dakota. We can take care of the immediate needs today. It's measurable. We believe we've defined the parameters. ... We're going to make it tough to get into this." Since 1990, 23 individual health insurance companies and 20 group insurance companies have stopped writing policies in South Dakota, the governor said. That leaves seven individual and 13 group companies, he said, and only three of the individual companies are major policy writers. The goal is to create breathing room, to take some pressure off companies and hold the ones that still write coverage in South Dakota while the state analyzes how well the program works, how many people it serves and what the costs are, Rounds said. Republican Rep. Claire Konold of Watertown has offered the only alternative to the governor's bills so far. He has proposed taking $5 million from a health trust fund to pay for the risk pool and warned that the cost would be greater than projected. "The risk pool will lose money; it will lose money every year," Konold said. "We have to accept the fact that we have to put money in every year." Konold's alternative plan failed on a 5-8 vote in committee. FUNDRAISING HARD FOR JERRY HINKLE Go figure, but the narrow-minded nitpickers at eBay will not let Jerry Hinkle sell either of his kidneys nor any other body parts without a letter from a doctor. Another narrow-minded nitpicker (Jerry's doctor) says that his heart is beating too fast for any surgery to take place. Jerry does have other funds though. He found $25 in gift certificates to the Runnings store and his niece Brittany gave him two pennies. Just $34.98 to go. Wednesday, June 25, 2003 VOL. II Issue 6N SOUTH DAKOTA ATTACKED BY TORNADOES There were at least 40 and possibly 60 tornadoes that touched down in South Dakota on Tuesday night between the hours of 5:30-11:30pm CDT. Several towns were damaged from the smallest to the largest. Manchester, South Dakota (population 20) lost all 8 of their occupied buildings as well as the other 2 which were not occupied. None of the residents were killed, but 4 were injured, 2 of those severly so. a passing motorist had his van wrapped around a tree. the fate of the vans driver and possible passenger is a not known as of now. Sioux Falls (population 115,000+) was also effected as were the surrounding towns of Brandon, Centerville, Lennox, Parker, Tea, and Viborg. each had varying degrees of damage, but Parker's Turner County Fairgrounds reported thier grandstand as "gone". Closer to Holabird, There was a tornado system that went from Stephan to south of Miller and southwest of Huron. Ken Ferris reported a lot of rain, strong wind, but no damage, not even to his tomato plants. Meanwhile, back at the Ponderosa they recieved .85 of an inch of rain. They are greatful that they didn't have tornadoes and hail like some of the other areas in the state. FARMERS UNION CAMP AGREES WITH BRITTANY HINKLE Brittany Hinkle enjoyed Farmers Union camp so much, she wants to go again. Her mother, Kristi, was told of a Farmers Union Family camp at Lake Herman. For $35, the whole family can go. Darrel and Kristi are thinking it over right now. When Brit's uncle, Jerry Hinkle, heard that Stephanie Herseth was going to be there, he set out to come up with $35. He is currently considering selling one of his kidneys on eBay. Tuesday, June 24, 2003 VOL. II Issue 6M HINKLE ANNIVERSARY CELEBRATED QUIETLY For Harold and Mary Hinkle, it was a low key celebration, more like an observance of their 40th annversary. They didn't even have cake and ice cream. in the morning Harold and darrel turned the bulls out with the calves. Mary watched her grandkids in the afternoon. Jerry Hinkle showed his niece Brittany the wedding album, which provided a lot of laughter as much has changed in the life of Harold and Mary. WEDDING ON THE NEMEC RANCH A source close to the Nemec family reports that Bridget Nemec will be getting married at her parents home north of Holabird. When this story first came to our attention, we thought they said it was Brigette Nemec. Since she is still in school we assume they meant her Aunt Bridget. The exact time of this event is not known. It is assumed that invitations will be forthcoming to those in the Holabird area deemed socially acceptable enough to attend one of Ed and Barbara Nemec's elegant parties. Hopefully our Publisher will pass muster, and will pass on the information to those who don't. I TOOK THE FREINDS QUIZ-YOU CAN TOO by Jerry Hinkle of the Holabird Advocate Recently a friend of mine had me take the Friends quiz. Of course, being courageous and dynamic I took it, even though I don't watch it and have no interest in watching it anytime soon. However, all of you that wonder which friend you are can take this quiz as well. At the bottom of the Holabird Advocate's home page is the link, just scroll down as soon as you are done reading all the news we see fit to print. As you can see I am Chandler Bing (whoever that is) because, I guess, I tell jokes and am goofy. Is that true? Feel free to let me know how you feel about the quiz and comment on my results and yours. Monday, June 23, 2003 VOL. II Issue 6L HAROLD AND MARY HINKLE CELERATE RUBY WEDDING It was on this day, June 23, forty years ago, that Harold Hinkle did the smartest thing that he ever has done. It is well known that Harold would only be 10% of the success he is now if he had let Mary get away. The 40th anniversary is ruby. It should be mentioned that in all the time they've been married they never once mentioned the word divorce. Murder sometimes, but divorce, NEVER. What's there secret for a long marriage? It's rather simple really, nobody else could have ever stayed married to either one of them. BRITTANY HINKLE GOES TO DAY CAMP In a surprise move, Darrel and Kristi Hinkle have allowed their 6 year old daughter Brittany to go to Farmers Union Day Camp tomorrow. They believe they can get her up and over there in time. One clitch though, they lost the medical release form. All of us at the Holabird Advocate feel sure that another one can be found. JOYCE FERRIS STAYS PUT Harrold Hinkle offered his sister, Joyce Ferris, the chance to stay with them at the Ponderosa while she gets some R&R for her back. She has, as we hear it, decided to stay home so that she can make sure that her husband, Ken, has clean laundry. She's not alone though, she has a 12 year old girl that helps her with all the heavy lifting. Ken and Joyces grandson, Adam Soulek is to arrive on July 7. No word on if he does laundy or not. JOKES FOR KIDZ by Brit Hinkle Q: What kind of underwear did King Tut use? A: Fruit of the Tomb! Q: What did King Tut say before he died? A: "I want my Mummy!" Saturday, June 21, 2003 VOL. II Issue 6K JOYCE FERRIS RECIEVES DIAGNOSIS Dr. Teuber has apparently discovered that Joyce Ferris has both a cracked vertabrae and at least one broken ribs. Some have commented at times that Joyce seems to break bones rather easily. As for her current condition, it sems that little can be done except for resting on her part. She has been given pain meds, and all of us at the Holabird Advocate hope they do her some good. BRITTANY HINKLE CONTINUES SUMMER LEARNING Jerry Hinkle took it upon himself to take his niece, Brittany, to the Historical Society museum this afternoon. She was especially impressed with all of the books that her great-grandmother, Bergit Hinkle compiled during her tenure with the Historical Society. E.E. Hinkle does not let anyone forget that his wife Bergit "started" The Historical Society. Since her passing eight and a half years ago her legacy has been kept in good hands. Let's hope it stays that way. OLD SETTLERS TRADITION CONTINUES One of Hyde counties most festive occasions is Old Settlers Day. Since it's inception in 1970, the celebration has continued to grow with the times. The first celebration consisted of the parade at 10:30 Saturday morning with a picnic at Quirk park at noon. A demolition derby and rodeo in the afternoon and a program Saturday night to crown the King and Queen. Later that evening there was a dance at the Auditorium. The passage of time has brought different events at different times, the events that pass the test of time always seem to continue. One thing that doesn't change is that Family and friends get together, have some good clean fun (or not so clean at times) and remember that Highmore and Hyde County are great places to live and visit. Old Settlers seems to call those who have roamed and welcome them home, even if just for a weekend in June. MSN USER SEARCHES FOR US AND FINDS US It was reported by the Circulation Department that as of 6:40 pm this evening a Webtv user armed with the MSN search engine has discovered the Holabird Advocate Newsblog. The best part is this: the search criteria was "Holabird Advocate". It seems our fame is spreading. It is hoped by the staff and Publisher of the Holabird Advocate that you, the Reader, will help in making it easier for those who are looking for us. Please all do remember that we have an announcer link. Friday, June 20, 2003 EXTRA! EXTRA! READ ALL ABOUT IT! In our Publishers haste top get clean and get going into Highmore he forgot to mention that the Old Settlers King was Don Kutz, who was also a former Holabird resident, in fact he lived north of Holabird as well. Mr. Kutz is also a lifelong resident of Hyde County, born there in 1921. He was married to Dorothy Sarvis on January 3, 1945. They had 2 daughters. He and his wife moved to Highmore in 1975, where she later died. Don is active in the local Senior Center. VOL. II Issue 6J AGNES HAHN TO BE CROWNED OLD SETTLER'S QUEEN The home office of the Holabird Advocate is buzzing with the news that Agnes Hahn will be crowned as the Old Settlers Day Queen tonight. Mrs Hahn, who is a lifelong member of Hyde County was born there on May 2, 1918. She was Married to Wilbur Goehring on February 27, 1937. She and Wilbur lived north of Holabird, where he farmed and ran cattle. They had 8 children together. After Wilbur's death on October 10, 1964, she lived as a widow until love found her a second time around with Ernest "Bud" Hahn. They were married on December 31, 1966. Shortly after his death on January 13, 1993, Agnes moved into Highmore, where she presently makes her home When he recieved the news, Holabird Advocate Publisher, Jerry Hinkle had a choice to make. He either was to bathe to go into the coronation tonight, or stay at home and watch Baby Bob. Needless to say, the bath water is being drawn. LAWYERS PLANNING TO SUE FOOD COMPANIES The country's greediest trial lawyers, boldest food nannies, and most outlandish academics will convene in Boston this weekend to plan a legal onslaught against restaurants. The Public Health Advocacy Institute (PHAI), which is playing host, declares that the event is "intended to encourage and support litigation against the food industry." The usual suspects -- lawyers and activists who use junk-science in an attempt to erode consumer freedom and turn food companies into their newest cash cow -- will be on hand: Richard Daynard -- PHAI president, Northeastern University law professor, and the "intellectual godfather of tobacco litigation." Even lawyers being sued by Daynard for 5% of their $3 billion tobacco settlement say he is "greedy." Kelly Brownell -- Yale psychologist most notable for having first proposed the infamous "Twinkie tax." Michael Jacobson -- executive director of the Center for Science in the Public Interest, the undisputed leader of America's food police. Jacobson is "proud about finding something wrong with practically everything." What will this motley crew of anti-consumer choice advocates plan? If their past remarks are any indication, it won't be to the benefit of ordinary consumers. They'll demonize the food choices of millions of Americans: "Sellers of food products do not attract the same kind of attention as purveyors of drugs or tobacco. They should." "We've got lots of different legal theories. We're also now looking at going after schools and school boards and even school board members." -- John Banzhaf, in an interview with National Public Radio's "Talk of the Nation" (August 8, 2002) "I think the litigators who've been talking about using their skills to improve the American diet and prevent obesity would do well to look at school systems." -- Michael Jacobson, at a Consumer Federation of America food policy conference (May 8, 2003) They'll trample individual rights and mock personal responsibility: "All these platitudes about, 'people should eat less,' 'responsibility,' all this crap!" -- John Banzhaf, in a speech at the Consumer Federation of America's food policy conference (May 8, 2003) "I recommend we develop a militant attitude about the toxic food environment, like we have about tobacco ... [smoking] became so serious that society overlooked the intrusion on individual rights for the greater social good." -- Kelly Brownell, in the Center for Science in the Public Interest's Nutrition Action Healthletter (July 1998) "A reaction of many readers may well be that our proposal [for government-issued 'Smoker ID' cards] gives too much information to government agencies, therefore creating a 'Big Brother' problem ... it may be too late to worry about the sort of privacy concerns that this proposal raises." -- PHAI speaker and Harvard Law School professor Jon Hanson, explaining his vision of government-mandated "smoker ID" cards that would keep track of a smoker's age, brand preference, and smoking frequency (Yale Law Journal, 1998). [Editor's note: scratch out "smoking," insert "eating."] They'll troll for media attention: "What persuaded us was, in a sense, the media. This thing is so radioactive in terms of media attention that cases will bring in other lawyers and bring in other cases." -- Richard Daynard discussing why he supports obesity lawsuits against restaurants, in Fortune magazine (January 21, 2003) And they'll set the stage for "sin taxes" on food and drink: "A small tax [on soft drinks] may be more politically feasible and would mostly go unnoticed by the public." -- Kelly Brownell and Michael Jacobson, in an article co-written for the American Journal of Public Health (June 2000) "[F]ood is too cheap in this country." "We could envision taxes on butter, potato chips, whole milk, cheeses, [and] meat." -- Michael Jacobson, in The Newark Star-Ledger (April 30, 2002) The PHAI event is billed as the first annual conference on "Legal Approaches to the Obesity Epidemic." It should be called "Brainstorming How to Get Rich off of the Obesity Scare." POETRY CORNER "Ragged Old Flag" I walked through a county courthouse square, On a park bench an old man was sitting there. I said, Your old courthouse is kinda run down. He said, Naw, it'll do for our little town. I said, Your flagpole has leaned a little bit, And that's a Ragged Old Flag you got hanging on it. He said, Have a seat, and I sat down. Is this the first time you've been to our little town? I said, I think it is. He said, I don't like to brag, But we're kinda proud of that Ragged Old Flag. You see, we got a little hole in that flag there When Washington took it across the Delaware. And it got a bad rip in New Orleans With Packingham and Jackson tuggin' at its seams. And it almost fell at the Alamo Beside the Texas flag, but she waved on though. She got cut with a sword at Chancellorsville And she got cut again at Shiloh Hill. There was Robert E. Lee, Beauregard, and Bragg, And the south wind blew hard on that Ragged Old Flag. On Flanders Field in World War I She got a big hole from a Bertha gun. She turned blood red in World War II She hung limp and low a time or two. She was in Korea and Vietnam. She went where she was sent by her Uncle Sam. She waved from our ships upon the briny foam, And now they've about quit waving her back here at home. In her own good land she's been abused -- She's been burned, dishonored, denied and refused. And the government for which she stands Is scandalized throughout the land. And she's getting threadbare and wearing thin, But she's in good shape for the shape she's in. 'Cause she's been through the fire before And I believe she can take a whole lot more. So we raise her up every morning, Take her down every night. We don't let her touch the ground And we fold her up right. On second thought I DO like to brag, 'Cause I'm mighty proud of that Ragged Old Flag. Written by Johnny Cash One nation "UNDER GOD" indivisible with liberty and justice for all. Wednesday, June 18, 2003 VOL. II Issue 6I E.E. HINKLE MADE CENTURY CLUB CHARTER MEMBER It is official, E.E. Hinkle is now a charter member of South Dakota's Century Club. The United Parcel Service delivered his plaque with an enclosed certificate late this morning. The members of the South Dakota Health Care Association and Foundation have sent congratulatory remarks. They are as follows: "The wisdom of your years is a special gift we encourage you to share as you continue touching the lives of others. On behalf of those we serve, we extend sincere congratulations. May you continue to share and dream for years to come." WHAT IS THE ANIMAL LIBERATION FRONT PETA has supported a cause called the Animal Liberation Front. The Animal Liberation Front is an illegal terrorist group that has engaged in acts of violence against animal-related enterprises around the world. The ALF was started in Great Britain in the 1970s and later spread to the United States and elsewhere. Although a number of ALF members have been arrested and convicted of crimes on both sides of the Atlantic, the group presents unique problems for law enforcement since in many respects it is more of a brand name for animal rights terrorism rather than a single overarching group. Activists who commit terrorist acts simply label their activities as being ALF actions -- there is no command structure or other formal organization. Information for this article was found on www. animalrights.net AOL IS SOL AOL says it expects to lose 300,000 dial-up subscribers this quarter. These are people who want a faster line of communication...so they're switching to the U.S. Mail. Tuesday, June 17, 2003 VOL. II Issue 6H CARD IS BETTER LATE THAN NEVER FOR E.E. HINKLE In today's mail E.E. Hinkle got a Fathers Day card from grandaughter Jani Peterson. He didn't care that it arrived two days late. He read it throughout anyway. He may not have been impressed that it was a Hallmark card, but he was still greatful. It is well known that E.E. enjoys getting mail anytime. SEVEN THINGS YOU DIDN'T KNOW ABOUT PETA 1.PETA has stated repeatedly that their goal is "total animal liberation." This means no pets, no meat, no milk, no zoos, no circuses, no fishing, no leather, and no animal testing for lifesaving medicines. 1 2.PETA has given tens of thousands of dollars to convicted arsonists and other violent criminals. 2 3.PETA funds the misnamed Physicians Committee for Responsible Medicine 3, an animal-rights organization that presents itself as an unbiased source for nutritional information and has links to a violent animal-rights group called SHAC. 4 4.PETA has used their contributors’ tax-exempt donations to fund the North American Earth Liberation front, an FBI-certified “domestic terrorist” group responsible for fire bombs and death threats. 5 5.PETA regularly targets kids as early as elementary school with anti-meat and anti-milk propaganda. 6 6.PETA spends less than one percent of its $13 million budget actually caring for animals. 7 7.PETA has repeatedly attacked groups like the March of Dimes, the Pediatric AIDS Foundation, and the American Cancer Society, for conducting animal testing to find cures for birth defects and life-threatening diseases. 8 Footnotes for this article: 1.Ingrid Newkirk, "Animal Rights 2002" convention keynote speech 2.Analysis of PETA's publicly available annual tax returns 3.Analysis of PETA's publicly available annual tax returns, click here for source 4.Letter to Japan Nippon Kayaku Corporation dated 9/20/2001, co-signed by PCRM president Neal Barnard and SHAC leader Kevin Jonas 5.PETA's publicly available annual tax return, fiscal year ending 7/31/2001 6.PETA web site 7.Analysis of PETA's publicly available annual tax returns 8.PETA web site There is more information available on this topic. To view this information log onto: www.animalscam.com Monday, June 16, 2003 VOL. II Issue 6G HINKLES HAVE BUSY HOLIDAY WEEKEND Jerry Hinkle has not been in the home office for awhile. He and the rest of his family hasn't exactly been idle though. Harold and Mary Hinkle attended the funeral services for Clarence Hansen getting back to Pierre just in time for Ashley Pothast's birthday paty on Saturday night. Darrel was planting millet at Spring Lake but knocked off early to take his family to the party as well. Jerry raised the flag for Flag Day early Saturday morning and then watched Darrel and Kristi's kids while Kristi attended the City-wide Rummage Sale in Miller. On Sunday Harold and Mary went fishing with Larry and Bonnie Nickleson and Andy Lennick at East Whitlock near Gettysburg. Darrel finished up at Spring Lake and moved closer to home. Kristi and Jerry helped him move. Just as Kristi was getting ready to take Jerry back home Darrel broke down and they had to find all the parts that fell off of the planter. Jerry has warned Darrel repeatedly about working on Sunday. E.E. Hinkle recieved phone calls from both of his daughters and grandson, Terry Kennedy wishing him well on Father's Day. Despite 93 degrees outside E.E. went for his walk that afternoon. This morning Darrel managed to put everything back together, with Harold and Jerry's help. WEEKEND FISHERMEN GO BUST For the past two Sundays Harold and Mary have been fishing. Neither time with very much success. On top of that, last week they lost all their bait, while yesterday they had a flat tire on the boat trailer just outside the Hyde County line and had to call Jerry to bring a over a jack. IT'S TIME TO GIVE OLD DAD HIS DUE. OR IS IT? by Jerry Hinkle of the Holabird Advocate We just celebrated Fathers Day in this country. But, do we really treat our fathers with the same reverence that we lavished our mothers with last month? President Wilson signed Mothers Day into law in 1914. The nation didn't give old Dad his day until (get this) 1972. That's right, old Tricky Dicky signed Fathers Day into law 31 years ago. Somebody took a survey as to what children would give each of their parents if money was no object. The most popular gift for the mother was a tie between a new dress and jewelry. The most popular answer for Dad-work gloves. Does this mean we live in a woman's world? Well, there is the whole equal pay for equal work thing, but perhaps the old saying of "The hand that rocks the cradle" has come into play here. At any rate, it looks like there's kind of a trade off. I hope that each and every one of you, the Readers, took at least a little time out yesterday to think about your father's contribution to your life and personality. One last thing. Eddie Murphy remembered that his father worked hard all year to give his kids all kinds of toys, including Train sets, Tyco race tracks, Etch-a-Sketch, etc. All his father got that year was a card with every one of the kids' name on it. Perhaps it's not a man's world or a woman's. Perhaps the world belongs to kids. Thursday, June 12, 2003 VOL. II Issue 6F FUNNEL CLOUD SIGHTED IN HYDE COUNTY Last nights weather was full of electricity last night. The was a tornado warning in Hyde County when Live Doppler 2000 spotted a funnel cloud 17 miles west of Onida, putting the cluoud a mile or two fromthe Ponderosa. Among those who saw the cloud was our courageous, dynamic Publisher Jerry Hinkle, who cowardly went to his grandfather's house to be closer to the basement. Nothing came of the tornado, however, and amid all the thunder and lightning the Ponderosa recieved a total of .05 inches of rain. The thunder was so loud that it kept E.E. Hinkle up past 11pm when Harold and Mary were just getting home from a GRHS board meeting in Pierre. JOYCE FERRIS TO GET MRI Because she has been in a great deal of pain for some time now, Joyce Ferris is going into St. Mary's Hospital in Pierre for an MRI tomorrow. She is taking this step because her regular doctor in Huron refuses to give her one in favor of an X-ray. Drs. Paul and Robert Hohm seem unable or unwilling to help her get the MRI. Once Joyce get's the MRI, She has an appointment with a Dr Teuber of Rapid City. This same Dr. Teuber, it is believed, performed Mary Hinkle's back surgery, so we know she's in the very best of hands. Joyce could sure do with relief. To hear her brother Harold tell the story it seems that she hasn't been able to climb stairs for several months now. All of us at the Holabird Advocate are hoping for the best. FAREWELL TO DAVID BRINKLEY AND GREGORY PECK The home office was shocked to hear about the passing of both David Brinkley and Gregory Peck. Both of these great men were two of the many voices that Publisher Jerry Hinkle could do a pretty fair impression when called upon to do so. David Brinkley was 82. He had the hard luck to compete with Walter Cronkite in the Evening News. His NBC Huntley/Brinkley report was a news institution in the 60s. He went on to ABC for "This Weekend" were he reviewed all the news and newsmakers in the week just passed. He was forced to retire after saying critical things about Bill Clinton when he thought he was off-air. His humility is what made him a great newsman and a great human being. That said there's only one way to properly pay tribute to him, with the following word's: "Good night, David" David Brinkley was a hard act to follow, but Gregory Peck has done it it. He had an acting carrer that lasted 54 years, playing a variety of roles in film and television, from Abe Lincoln to General MacArthur. His best known effort was most likely his role in 1962 as Atticus Finch in "To Kill a Mockingbird" for which he won the Acadamy Award. Some have said that he didn't deserve the award because he was really a caring compassionate father, as well as a good human being. It just goes to show you that sometimes the good guys do win. Peck was 87. Wednesday, June 11, 2003 VOL. II Issue 6E HANSEN FUNERAL TO BE FRIDAY The latest word from the Hansen family is that "Pa" Hansen's funeral service is to held Friday 10am CDT with burial in his native Platte, South Dakota Saturday at 1pm with a "fly over" as part of the service. We will have more details when they come in. Harold and Mary Hinkle will be going to both services and leaving sometime tomorrow for Forest City. They will be staying at the Super 8 Motel in beautiful downtown Forest City. HYDE COUNTY FARMERS UNION TO HAVE DAY CAMP The Hyde County Farmers Union will have a day camp from 9am-12:30pm at the South Park in Highmore, South Dakota. For more information call Mary Jo Nemec at (605) 852-2385. Jerry Hinkle thought that that camp would be fun for his niece Brittany, but 9am is kind of early for her. BRITTANY HINKLE'S HEALTH IMPROVING Since switching to Cipro, Brittany Hinkle is feeling better. She has plenty of energy and an appetite that would make her great-grandmother, Bergit Hinkle proud. Brit's biggest complaint was sore feet. After her uncle, Jerry Hinkle put some Ultimate Aloe Gel on her feet, however, Brit was showing her grandma all the latest dance moves and steps that she's learning in her dance class. THE LIFE AND TIMES OF CLARENCE O. HANSEN Clarence O. Hansen, 89, of Forest City, died Tuesday (June 10, 2003) at Mercy Medical Center-North Iowa in Mason City. Funeral services will be at 10 a.m. Friday at the Immanuel Lutheran Church in Forest City with the Rev. Lee Laaveg officiating. Burial will be 1 p.m. Saturday at the Platte City Cemetery in Platte, S. D. Visitation will be from 5 to 8 p.m. Thursday at the Petersen Lund Funeral Home, 505 N. Clark St. in Forest City and one hour prior to services Friday at the church. Clarence O. Hansen was born on Feb. 8, 1914, at Platte, South Dakota, the youngest of eight children to Claus and Marie (Fridell) Hansen. He was baptized and confirmed at the Trinity Lutheran Church in Platte, and married Ilah M. Beltman of Platte on Jan. 8, 1936. In 1946 he founded the Platte Airport and for 16 years managed it and taught flying through the G.I. Bill. He was a bulk truck driver for Mobil Oil Co. of Platte, a mechanic for Roy Berguson of Platte, A & R Import Motors in Rapid City, and retired after 15 years from Winnebago Industries in Forest City. He was a member of Immanuel Lutheran Church of Forest City, a member of the Civil Air Patrol, AOPA (Aircraft Owners & Pilots Association) EAA (Experimental Aircraft Association) and built his own Fly Baby Airplane, and in 1996 he was inducted into the South Dakota Aviation Hall of Fame in Spearfish, S. D. He is survived by his wife, Ilah, of 67 years; two children, Ken (Joan) Hansen of Forest City, Iowa, Verla (Ron) Kamykowski of Stickney, Ill.; five grandchildren, Glenn (Crystal ) Kamykowski, Kristi (Jim) Teolis, Susan (Greg) Geitzenauer, Kevin (Jaime) Hansen and Annette Hansen; six great-grandchildren and many nieces and nephews. He was preceded in death by his parents, his sisters Elizabeth Cool, Erma Weldin and Ella Wilcox of Platte, Adeline Johnson of Naugatuck, Conn., Edith Johnson of Yankton, S.D.; and brothers, Edwin Hansen of Seattle, Wash. and Herbert Hansen of Platte, South Dakota. Tuesday, June 10, 2003 VOL. II Issue 6D E.E. HINKLE TO BE INDUCTED IN THE CENTURY CLUB Mary Hinkle called the South Dakota Health Care Foundation to inquire about a membership in the Century Club for her father-in-law, E.E. Hinkle. The Century Club is open to any South Dakota resident nearing their 100th birthday. There are no dues to belong(after 100 years of living they feel you've paid your dues already). Century Club Members will recieve a plaque when they reach their 100th birthday. It is not known exactly what will happen concerning E.E.'s membership, considering he's almost 101. If his family had known how to go about this last year, they would have. If the application is successful, KELOLAND TV will air his name on July 4th during "Midday in KELOLAND" at noon. The Holabird Advocate will provide a videotaped copy of that episode for $19.95 plus $3.50 for shipping and Handling. CLARENCE HANSEN EARNS HIS FINAL WINGS Word has been recieved that Clarence "Pa" Hansen passed away at 11:15am CDT. Funeral arrangements are pending, but it is believed that services will be held on Friday in Forest City, Iowa, with burial in his native Platte, South Dakota. BIG CHANGES AT BLOGGER The Holabird Advocate has been off line waiting for the conversion to BloggerBasic. If the Readers see any change, we hope it will be a positive experience. As Bernie Hunhoff once said, "Change is inevitable. Negative change is not." The Holabird Advocate will certainly put that to the test. Friday, June 06, 2003 VOL. II Issue 6C "PA" HANSEN TO BE TAKEN OFF LIFE SUPPORT There has been a report that Clarence Hansen will be taken off life support sometime today. Because none of us at the Holabird Advocate have any medical background, all we can do is speculate about what this means. What we do know is that "Pa" can only be hooked up to this pump for 5 days, of which this is the 5th day. As far as we know, he is still in the critical care unit in Mason City, Iowa. We don't know if he will come home or even if that's a viable option. It all depends on what his 89 year old heart can stand. We will bring further developments to you as best we can, and ask that you, the Readers keep "Pa" and his family in your own thoughts and prayers throughout the coming weeks. PASTOR AVON FALLS THROUGH It was announced that Pastor Avon is unable to accept the position of Pastor for the Blunt, Harrold, and Highmore(BHH) United Methodist Parish. Exactly what BHH is going to do about this is unknown at this time. Pastor Phil's last Sunday is June 29. Jerry Hinkle was heard to say "There's always the Luthern Church". HINKLE'S TO HAVE SURPRISE PARTY Brittany Hinkle is having a surprise birthday party for her mother Kristi tonight. To make sure she shows up she was told all about it. With help from her Grandma Mary and Betty Crocker she made a cake for the occasion. Brit helped make the frosting too. Chocolate both times. MELBOURNE, AUSTRAILIA DISCOVERES THE HOLABIRD ADVOCATE The Circulation Department of the Holabird Advocate has reported that as of 1:10 this afternoon, someone from Melbourne, Austrailia logged on to the Holabird Advocate Newsblog web site. There is a certain amount of speculation that it could be someone who met the Immanuel Luthern Church group of missionaries. We can neither confirm nor deny that. As Publisher Jerry Hinkle said, "Whoever they are, I'm glad they found us. I hope they continue for years to come!" Thursday, June 05, 2003 VOL. II Issue 6B NO CHANGE IN "PA" HANSEN'S CONDITION Clarence Hansen still clings to life, although we understand it's to be a losing battle. His heart is only at 20% right now. Bergit Hinkle was 30% when she left the hospital and died a month later. There has been little change in his condition since we last reported on it earlier this week. Presently all one can do is sit back, relax if they can, and leave it up to God. It sounds easy, but it's not as easy as all that. All of us at the Holabird Advocate send our best thought's wishes and prayers out for Pa Hansen and his family. SOUTH DAKOTA HAS BSE CONNECTION William "Wild Bill" Janklow called a press conference to let the media know that a bull from the Canadian herd in Alberta that produced a cow with BSE, known commonly as "Mad Cow Disease". This matter is under investigation.But Janklow was critical of the pace of the U.S. Department of Agriculture has taken in its investigation. "I'm really disappointed in how long it's taken USDA to jump on this," he said. "It doesn't appear the USDA has been working with the same sense of urgency that they've been talking." Before Janklow had a conference call with South Dakota reporters, USDA had a press conference to confirm the Canadian mad cow investigation had led to the U.S. Five bulls sold to a rancher in Montana in 1997 were born the year before in the same herd as the one afflicted cow in Saskatchewan. Two animals were sold to ranches in Montana and South Dakota between 1999 and 2002. The afflicted cow turned up in a herd in northern Alberta. He said, however, that it's highly unlikely the animals which came to the U.S. were afflicted with Bovine Spongiform Encephalopathy. The bulls were sold at sale barns in the state, but they aren't going to be identified at this time. "We have no reason to be overly concerned," Janklow said. "This is all showing our system worked." Officials will learn quickly how they came into the U.S. and then South Dakota. If the animals were sold in South Dakota, there will be records of it, and more information was likely by this morning. The longer it takes for a cow to manifest BSE the less likely other animals will have it, Janklow said. "This appears to be long simmering," he said. Officials are now working to find out what happened to the bulls. In the meantime, the border remains closed to Canadian beef products. "Our food supply is safe," Janklow said. "It's the safest in the world." What we at the Holabird Advocate fail to understand is, if there is no reason to worry why is Janklow speaking to the media. Could be he's trying to start a panic by telling people not to worry. When Bill Janklow says not to worry, we find it is the best time to start worrying. KRISTI'S GREENHOUSE HAS "BIRTHDAY SALE" All this week Kristi Hinkle has been having a weeklong sale at her greenhouse. She will have 48 different kinds of plants plants on sale. The sale will be over tomorrow on her actual birthday. Monday, June 02, 2003 VOL. II Issue 6A FAMED AVIATOR CLARENCE "PA" HANSEN ON LIFE SUPPORT Former South Dakota aviation pioneer Clarence Hansen, of Forrest City, Iowa, was rushed to emergency open-heart surgery over the weekend. Hansen, known as "Pa" to family and friends is currently on life support. His children and grandchildren have been summoned, and it is expected that he may not live out the week. The situation, in an earthly sense is critical. All of us at the Holabird Advocate, however, believe that this is a fight that Pa Hansen can not lose. If he dies, he will simply earn his wings once again to fly over all God's creation. Should he live, he will have one more story to tell. You can trust the Holabird Advocate to stay on top of this story. SOCIETY: SUZANNE NEMEC BECOMES SUZANNE MCCLOUD On Saturday, May 31, the Nemec-McCloud wedding took place as scheduled. Although 375 people sent an RSVP, Carol Zilverberg counted 9 empty tables. The ceremony lasted for 90 minutes, giving both Suzanne and Derek ample time to back out if they so desired, but true love, or a reasonable facsimale, won the day and they were made husband and wife. Of course the easy part is over. Anybody with a kindergarten education can say "I do". the true test of love will be if they can continue to say it for the next 70 years. All of us at the Holabird Advocate send the newly pronounced Mr. and Mrs. McCloud our best wishes. METHODIST CHURCH GETS NEW MINISTER It was announced at services yesterday that the Methodist parish of Blunt, Harrold, and Highmore will be getting a new minister. His first name is Avon, the last name is unpronouncible in the English language, but as soon as we get the proper spelling, it will be run in the Holabird Advocate. Pastor Avon is 64 years old. He has a wife who has M.S.. He and his wife like the parsonage and have consented to live in it despite certain parish members who say the house is unfit for human habitation. Pastor Avon begins his service to the Church on July 6 
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