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Holabird Advocate

Providing all the news we see fit to print since 2002!


Saturday, November 30, 2002
 
VOL. I Issue 11S
PONDEROSA HAS PILGRIMS APLENTY
Leftovers were in short supply after the Thanksgiving get together at the Ponderosa on Thanksgiving Day. In attendance, besides those prevoiusly mentioned, were Ken and Joyce Ferris. After the meal, Jaime and Ashley Pothast begged until they were allowed to practice driving.
Ken and Joyce left early to conduct business in Pierre. Joyce came back over for the weekend on Friday afternoon.
Darrel and Kristi had good luck with their feast as well. They deep fried a 20lb turkey in about an hour and had Stove Top Stuffing. Kristi's Father, Jan van Tassel left on Friday morning.
FORMER HYDE COUNTY RESIDENT DIES
Lucinda Zilverberg lost her battle with cancer on Thanksgiving Day. She was just a month past 52 years old. All of us at the Holabird Advocate send our thoughts prayers and best wishes to her family at this time. Funeral arrangements are pending.
PLANS MADE FOR ISSUE 12
by Jerry Hinkle
Yes, dear Readers, it will soon be time to start Issue 12 of the Holabird Advocate. Our poll will help decide which, if any, Bravenet services we avail ourselves of. We will also reveal our "Person of the Year" for 2002 on December 2nd, by 12 o'clock noon (I hope). I will tell you this much right now. It is a woman, but it is not Stephanie Herseth. If you want to find out more, you'll have to read on Monday afternoon.
That's what I have planned. Of course the unplanned things on this newsblog are usually the best, don't you think. I do.





Tuesday, November 26, 2002
 
VOL. I Issue 11R
VALLEY TOWNSHIP BOARD TO MEET
The Valley Township board will meet in executive session at The Ponderosa tonight at 7pm. As a result, Holabird Advocate Publisher and private citizen, Jerry Hinkle will not be allowed to be present. Mary Hinkle is not on the board, but is serving lunch, so she will be allowed. Mary has said that it is no big deal and that at least the board has refrained from telling dirty jokes and other off color talk since Peg Zilverberg was made Treasurer.
COLD SNAP HITS HOLABIRD
Single digit temps were reported as the Holabird Metropolitan area braced itself for winter. It is expected to warm up gradually until Friday with a chance for snow showers Saturday and Sunday, just in time for the Snow Queen pagent on December 1st.
POETRY CORNER
This poem was submitted by Mrs. Lynette Goehring of Yankton, S.D. The author, however, is unknown to her.
GIVING THANKS
For the hay and the corn and the wheat that is reaped,
For the labor well done, and the barns that are heaped,
For the sun and the dew and the sweet honeycomb,
For the rose and the song and the harvest brought home --
Thanksgiving! Thanksgiving!

For the trade and the skill and the wealth in our land,
For the cunning and strength of the workingman's hand,
For the good that our artists and poets have taught,
For the friendship that hope and affection have brought --
Thanksgiving! Thanksgiving!

For the homes that with purest affection are blest,
For the season of plenty and well-deserved rest,
For our country extending from sea unto sea;
The land that is known as the "Land of the Free" --
Thanksgiving! Thanksgiving!
~Author Unknown~





Friday, November 22, 2002
 
VOL. I Issue 11Q
NO TRIP FOR WILBUR GOEHRING
Because of strained relations between Cuba and the United States, the trip that Wilbur Goehring, formerly of Holabird, was going to be a part of was cancelled. The Holabird Advocate had reported earlier that this trip was taking place, but had no other details at that time. Now there are no other details to report.
HAROLD HINKLE GOES DOMESTIC
Earlier, it was reported that Harold Hinkle was operating the vaccum around the house. Now, he has started sweeping floors and making his bed. What comes next? Washing dishes perhaps? His wife Mary found out he doesn't do windows, as she has been washing them for the last few days. After getting over the shock of this last chain of events, everyone around the Ponderosa has said that they wish he'd either do it without complaining or just not do it at all. You'd think he was bucking for a medal or something.
POETRY CORNER
This poem was written around 1915 by E.E. Hinkle as a 7th grade assignment. it was originally published in "Staying Power" a history book compiled by the Hyde County Historical Society.
SOUTH DAKOTA
I love the name of South Dakota
because it's my home State
others see it as prarie land
and just one of fourty eight

from the Sioux and James valley
with it's wheat and towering maize
to the prairie upland pasture
where the hers of cattle graze

its a State of atural beauty
you just cant wait to see the rest
theres the bad lands and black hills
all nestled in the west

the vacation land of millions
with its lakes and winding streams
seem to fascinate and hold you
and fulfilll your wildest dreams

its minerals and it's tall pines
indeed they are a part
they are a thing of beauty
and indear it to your heart

South Dakota land of beauty
I am proud to be a native son
you may be one of fourty eight
but to me you are number one





Thursday, November 21, 2002
 
VOL. I Issue 11P
BRITTANY HINKLE TO TAKE PART IN PAGENT
The Snow Queen Pagent has been a part of South Dakota's herritage for several years. This year Brittany Hinkle of Holabird, and the rest of the girls in the Highmore School's kindergaten class will be part of the exitement as "Little Queens". Brit's mother, Kristi Hinkle, went to Aberdeen to find a suitable dress for the occasion. Highmore's Snow Queen Pagent will be held on December 1st at the Hyde County Memorial Auditorium.
HERSETH IS STAYING IN SOUTH DAKOTA
Stephanie Herseth says she's staying put. After her Election Day loss to Bill Janklow in the race for U.S. House, Herseth said she planned to stay in South Dakota. She says she's been talking to law firms across the state about job opportunities.Since the election, Herseth spent a week in Mexico and has been in Sioux Falls closing up her campaign office. She has not ruled out another run for office, but does say the timing has to be right.All of us at the Holabird Advocate wish her well.
Perhaps Morley Krupt could make her a partner in his firm.
THE GREAT AMERICAN SMOKEOUT-MY THOUGHTS
by Jerry Hinkle, Special to the Holabird Advocate
Today was the Great American Smokeout. All smokers are asked to take this one day out of the year to quit cold turkey (interesting that it's done a week before Thanksgiving, huh). Now I don't smoke, but as long as i'm not breathing the second hand smoke, I really don't get too upset about it if I can avoid it. I do hope that all of the smoking Readers out there did quit for the day. If you did quit for the day, swell. If you tryed, but couldn't quite do it, well there's always next year. If you didn't even bother to quit, shame on you. If you couldn't quit for just one day out of the year, you got a problem. Still, we all love you and hope you'll still love us when I say that.
I have become more accepting of smokers in the last few years. As long as they don't blow the smoke right at us, I believe that we, the non-smoker should stand up for the rights of the smoker. As stand up comic Rosane Barr once said "You should be nicer to peole that are dying! ". Seriously though, We live in the land of the free. If we have a "No Smoking Zone", perhaps a "Smoking Zone" is in order. If there is a smoker in your life and he or she is considerate of your rights not to smoke, I hope you'll return the favor be considerate of their right to smoke.
One last thing to all you smokers out there. Remember that it was, after all your decision and I don't want you sueing the tobacco companies. You're an adult so take the consequences as they come. 'nuff said.





Monday, November 18, 2002
 
VOL. I Issue 11O
THIS YEAR THE HINKLES ARE INDIANS
Holabird Publisher, Jerry Hinkle says there are two kinds of people on Thanksgiving. They are: Pilgrims, who go somewhere to eat, and Indians, who eat at home. Usually the Hinkle family are Pilgrims, on that journey "over the river and through the woods" to Agnes Hahn's house. This year, after much arm twisting and hair pulling on Mary Hinkle's part, they are going to be Indians. So far Mary has convinced her son Doug and his family to come over as well as Agnes herself, even though she knows it will be too much work for Mary to do. Mary may have Larry and Bonnie Nickleson talked into it as well.
Darrel and Kristi will be Indians as well. They will play host to Jan Van Tassel, Kristi's father, as well as the families of her two brothers Patrick and Jeremy Van Tassel. All of us at the Holabird Advocate don't know how much of a meal there'll be, but we know Shelby Hinkle will be the first one to start doing dishes after the meal. Pretty good for a kid that's not quite 2 tears old yet.
DOCTORS SAY WINE HELPS MEMORY
A medical report said last week that drinking 3 glasses of wine a day is good helps people remember things more clearly. After hearing that report Mary Hinkle wondered where she hid her bottle of wine.
CBS EARLY SHOW HAS "WEEK OF WISHES"
by Jerry Hinkle, Special to the Holabird Advocate
Because it is owned by my hero Mr. Sumner Redstone CBS is my favorite broacasting network. Even though i have yet to here their response to my "Fat Guy/ Hot Wife idea for a show. The "Early Show" on CBS is doing a "week of wishes" giving 5 people a "wish". It's needless to say I'm not one of 'em. Were it to be so, it would be this.(are you listenin' Mr Redstone, Sir) I wish that those female co-hosts would be removed (by deadly force if neccessary) and replaced by Anna-Nicole Smith. Just think about it Mr. Redstone, Sir, "The Early Show With Harry Smith and Anna Nicole Smith"! Of course, If that doesn't work how about finding a lady with a lot of hair whose name just happens top be Baldy Jones. "The Early Show with Harry Smith and Baldy Jones"! Nice ring to it, don't you think.
Oh Mr. Redstone, Sir ! How about: ANNA NICOLE SMITH AS MY HOT WIFE !!!!! Nah, She's already got a TV show. Still there's always Winona Ryder. At any rate, think it over Mr. Redstone, Sir.





Saturday, November 16, 2002
 
VOL. I Issue 11N
E.E. HINKLE BOUNCES BACK-AGAIN
It must have been just a 24 hour bug that bit 100 year old E.E. Hinkle. He is feeling better but is still a bit weak. Joyce was feeling a little run down this morning, but went on to Tulare without her father as her husband Ken, CEO of Ferris Crane Service, needed her assistance right away. At his usual 3 o'clock "Boost time" he had a bowl of pudding, a donut and half of a "Boost" serving, saving the other half for the evening.
ACTORS CHARGED IN PORN INVESTIGATION
by Andrew Bridges, Associated Press Writer
Actor Paul Reubens, best known as Pee-wee Herman, and actor Jeffrey Jones of "Ferris Bueller's Day Off" were charged Friday in a year-old child pornography investigation.
Jones, 56, best known as the high school principal in "Ferris Bueller," was charged with hiring a 14-year-old boy to pose for sexually explicit photos and possessing child pornography, authorities said.
"The charges do not involve any sex act being performed or any video or film being taken," said Sandi Gibbons, spokeswoman for the district attorney's office.
Jones' attorney, Jeffrey Brodey, told the Los Angeles Times that the charges are "all about photos. There's no allegations of any touching or any improper acts with a minor." Brodey did not immediately return a phone call Friday.
Reubens was charged with one misdemeanor count of possessing materials depicting children under 18 engaged in sexual conduct, said Ana Garcia, a spokeswoman for the city attorney's office.
Reubens' attorney, Blair Berk, said in a statement that the charge was untrue. "Mr. Reubens has never at any time knowingly possessed any artwork from his extensive vintage and antique art collection even remotely related to anything improper," he said.
Jones surrendered to police Thursday and was freed on $20,000 bail; he is scheduled to be arraigned next week. If convicted, he faces three years in prison and will have to register as a sex offender for life, Gibbons said.
The District Attorney's office determined there was no evidence of a felony in Reubens' case and referred it to the City Attorney's office for possible prosecution as a misdemeanor, she said.
Reubens, 50, surrendered to police Friday and was released after posting $20,000 bail. He will be arraigned Dec. 19 and faces a maximum of one year in county jail and a $2,500 fine.
In 1991, Reubens pleaded no contest to an indecent exposure charge after being arrested in a Sarasota, Fla., movie theater. After that, his children's show was canceled and his star faded, but he has played supporting roles in the films "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" and "Blow."
A widely recognized character actor, Jones played the music-loving Emperor Joseph II in "Amadeus," the mentalist Criswell in "Ed Wood" and the father in "Beetlejuice."
Authorities searched the homes of both men Nov. 16, 2001, the district attorney and city attorney said. The statute of limitations on the misdemeanors would have run out Saturday if charges had not been filed.
Materials taken from Reubens were unrelated to the Jones case, said Jane Robison, a spokeswoman in the Los Angeles County District Attorney's office. Reubens and Jones are acquaintances and both cases stem from the same investigation, said Sandi Gibbons, a spokeswoman for the District Attorney's office.
PETA MAKES A SCENCE AT FASHION SHOW
by Jerry Hinkle, Special to the Holabird Advocate
When I started my PETA movement earlier this year, I did it to make fun of the ridiculous PETA group that has pulled off some real whoppers in their time. This latest caper involving the "Victoria's Secret" fashion show was asinine. These morons were protesting the wearing of fur at a fashion show where there were no models wearing fur at all.
Of all the protesters there, the one I respected the most was that Miss Behavior, one who protested in a "gown" made of meat. Now this gal was kinda fleshy herself, so we know she's not a vegetarian. She said this was a "Meat Show". I have to disagree with that. From the news footage I saw, those models have precious little meat on their bones. One wonders if she was just a bit jealous of the girls on the runway. After all, you'll notice that she didn't protest the showing of "Victoria's Big Secret" now, did she.





Friday, November 15, 2002
 
VOL. I Issue 11M
E.E. HINKLE CATCHES FLU BUG
LOTTA GOOD THAT SHOT DID
A strain of flu that was not covered by this year's flu shot has E.E. Hinkle in a bad way. His daughter Joyce Ferris came over hoping to take him to the Tulare, south Dakota area to look at the dugout that Ferris Crane Service is working on. The old boy has not been able to keep food down but so far has been able to take green tea and is keeping that down for now.
This is not Joyce's first experience with the flu because she was hospitalized because of it earlier this year. It is unknown at this time whether or not Joyce will go to Tulare and whether she will take her father along. All of us at the Holabird Advocate send our best wishes out to him and hope he gets better soon.
POETRY CORNER
Zoe Maginnis was an interesting lady. She lived at a time when the living was tough. Her firstborn son, John Acel Maginnis was delivered prematurely on April 10, 1910 and lived only 45 days. One can only guess the emotions behind this poem given that it is unknown when it was written. That said please read and understand
A MOTHERS PRAYER
They buried my baby in the snow,
Where the drifts lie cold and deep.
But somewhere in heaven, he's waiting I know,
For someone to sing him to sleep.
Dear father in Heaven, oh please, can't you spare
An angel from heavenly skies,
To croon to my boy of an old rocking chair,
And a mother who sang lullibies.
And if he should waken, and cry for his bed,
So far, far away in the night.
Please ask a wee star, or a moonbeam instead,
To comfort my boy with it's light.
Please tell him his teddy's as good as can be.
(His poor little teddy,) and then,
Whisper-I love him-and kiss him for me,
Dear Father in Heaven, Amen.





Thursday, November 14, 2002
 
VOL. I Issue 11L
HERSETH CLOSES HER CAMPAIGN DOWN
HOLABIRD ADVOCATE BEGINS A NEW ONE
by Jerry Hinkle, Special to the Holabird Advocate
The election is over and we lost, South Dakota I mean. Ms. Herseth had a great campaign. I new going in it would be tough. And so it was. I can't tell you the profound sadness I felt when I had to publish the news that Janklow was elected. Still, we live in a free soceity despite Bill Janklow's best effort to turn South Dakota into a Nazi police state.
In a way, Janklows victory will make it possible for the Holabird Advocate to grow. This newsblog intends to watch Janklow very closely and report on every single thing he's doing that is even the least bit nefarious. One other bit of consolation is that he won't be having the free reign he had here to cause trouble. He may think he's won but he may well think he should have lost by the time we're through.
Lastly here is a letter from Ms, Herseth. I think she tells her message better than I can:
Dear Friends and Supporters:
Thank you for helping to make my campaign for Congress such a wonderful journey. I greatly appreciate your support and encouragement as I traveled across South Dakota, offering new ideas and a fresh perspective on both new and longstanding challenges that we face as a state and as a nation. Your efforts and generosity made our efforts possible, and although Election Night’s results were disappointing, the campaign journey has been an inspiration to me – one that I will carry with me the rest of my life.
I am proud of the campaign we ran, and I hope you are as well. I am proud of the positive vision we projected for South Dakota’s future, and of the energy and enthusiasm we added to the process. We demonstrated that you can run a strong campaign while keeping a positive tone focused on issues that matter most to everyday folks. I believe we ran a campaign that truly reflects South Dakota’s values.
I look forward to visiting with many of you in the weeks and months ahead – to thank you for embracing this campaign and to engage in a continued dialogue with me on the issues we both care so much about. Again, thanks so much for your kindness, and I hope to see you soon.
Sincerely,

Stephanie M. Herseth





Wednesday, November 13, 2002
 
VOL. I Issue 11K
SENATE ELECTION OVER
JOHN THUNE CONCEDES
Yesterday in Pierre the state mandated recount gave outgoing Representitive, John Thune, four more votes in the election for U.S. Senator. This was far short of the 528 he needed. A second recount could have been conducted, but Mr. Thune deciced not to pursue the matter, therby conceding the election victort to incumbant Senator Tim Johnson. When asked about future plans challenger Thune had no comment. It is the hope of all of us at the Holabird Advocate that part of his future plans include returning the much talked about overdue library book. All joking aside, we wish Mr. Thune well in his retirement.
E.E. HINKLE PASSES PHYSICAL
As expected E.E. Hinkle did well with Dr. Douglas. He won't have to see him for another six months. The old boy is still gaining weight, which will come in handy for the cold winter months. The only problem E.E. has right now is that somebody put $700 in his checking account. We should all have that problem.





Tuesday, November 12, 2002
 
VOL. I Issue 11J
E.E. HINKLE GETS MEDICINE
PREPARES TO SEE DR. DOUG
Once again E.E. Hinkle has to go to the doctor and put up with the old poke, prod, and cough to see how he's getting along once more. No trouble is expected although he's been feeling a little stiff and sore here lately. Old age is not for the faint of heart.
Harold and Mary Hinkle went to the K-mart pharmacy in Pierre to get his prescription filled. E.E was out and Harold was worried that if E.E. was off his medication too long, bad things would happen.
JERRY HINKLE TO GET PUBLISHED IN ARGUS LEADER
Last week, quite by accident, Holabird Advocate Publisher, Jerry Hinkle wrote a "letter to the editor" to three diferent South Dakota newspapers. He thought that he was writing about his grandfather, E.E. Hinkle, to give these newspapers a story idea. Thus far only the Sioux Falls Argus Leader has told him that the letter was being published. No word yet of when this will happen. The Holabird Advocate will make copies of the letter to all interested parties.





Monday, November 11, 2002
 
VOL. I Issue 11I
HOLABIRD ADVOCATE SALUTES AMERICA'S VETERANS
by Jerry Hinkle, Special to the Holabird Advocate
I have decided to dedicate todays edition of the newsblog to my Uncle, Donald E. Hinkle, a Marine. Few and proud they say. There are fewer WWII Marines every day. What we call Veterans Day was originaly Armistice Day to observe the "Great Armistice" (peace) after "The War to End All Wars". You may laugh at that, but I don't find it funny that war still exists in the world of today. Not funny at all.
Perhaps we can use this occasion to reflect on the great stuggle since peace was declared on the 11th hour of the 11th day od the 11th month of 1918. We in America can all thank the veterans, both living and dead for keeping this country safe from Freedom's foe all these years since. Hitler, Tojo, Mussolini, Sigmon Rhee, Ho Chi Mihn, Saddam, Osama, The names have changed but the situation hasn't. Our Veterans loved America. They fought, and some died, for Lady Liberty, the flag, for you and me. America loves it's veterans, or does it. I hope that all of you that are able to will say a word of thanks to a veteran today. Yes, it may sound corny, but it just might make their day. You owe it to them. Don't you? 'nuff said
SOUTH DAKOTA SONGBOOK
THE MARINE'S HYMN
words by that great composer Anonymous:

From the Halls of Montezuma
To the shores of Tripoli
We fight our country's battles
In the air on land and sea.
First to fight for right and freedom
And to keep our honor clean;
We are proud to bear the title
Of United States Marines!

Our flag's unfurled to every breeze
From dawn to setting sun;
We have fought in every clime and place
Where we could take a gun.
In the snow of far-off Northern lands
And in sunny tropic scenes;
You will find us always on the job --
The United States Marines!

Here's health to you and to our Corps
Which we are proud to serve;
In many a strife we've fought for life
And never lost our nerve.
If the Army and the Navy
Ever look on Heaven's scenes,
They will find the streets are guarded
By United States Marines !





Saturday, November 09, 2002
 
VOL. I Issue 11H
E.E. HINKLE HAS 3RD GREAT-GREAT-GRANDCHILD
E.E. Hinkle has recieved word that he has a another great-great-grandchild, a girl named Avery Tarynn Kline. She was born November 7, at 4:59pm. Her height: 21 inches long, weight: 7lbs 11oz. Other vital statistics are unavailable at this time. Avery family includes big sister Madison and parents Paul and Dani Kline. Grandparents Kelvin and Donna Kennedy. Great-grandparents George and Mavis Kennedy. Mother and baby are doing well, in fact Dani has said she wants to have another go, just not anytime soon.
KENNEDYS ARRIVE IN ARIZONA
Becoming great-grandparents hasn't slowed down George and Mavis Kennedy. Thet arrived at their park model home in Green Valley, Arizona at about 11pm local time. They have sent word to Harrold and Mary of their whereabouts. They are expected to stay in that area until sometime in the Christmas season. They avoided the nasty weather that they feared and have no visable snow to contend with
SOCIETY: JUSTIN HINKLE HAS BIRTHDAY PARTY
No more "Baby Justin" for this kid. Justin Hinkle turned 1 year old yesterday. Today a party was thrown in his honor at the home he shares with his parents, Darrel and Kristi Hinkle and sisters Brittany and Shelby. Helping with hostest duties was Beth Aasby, who brought along her children Digit and Ayden. others in attendance were: great-grandparents E.E. Hinkle and Agnes Hahn, grandparents Ruby Hoffman, Harold and Mary Hinkle, uncles Wilbur Goehring, Jerry and Doug Hinkle, aunt Noel Pothast, cousins Jaimie and Ashley Pothast and Cade Hinkle. It was obseved that the toy industry fared well because of this occasion.





Thursday, November 07, 2002
 
VOL. I Issue 11G
KENNEDYS HEADING SOUTH
TO BEAT THE BLOWING SNOW
At 8 am. this morning George and Mavis Kennedy started out for Arizona, hoping to be there before the snow that is predicted to fall by Sunday night. Last night, Darrel, Kristi, Brittany, Shelby, and Justin Hinkle went up to the Ponderosa to visit them. The kids were quite lively.
BRITTANY HINKLE HAS GOOD REPORT CARD
Report cards are out for the 1st quarter of the school year. Brittany Hinkle has a lot of Ss and Es on her report card. Her teacher, Mrs. LaMont, has complimented Brit for her example to the other kids. She has been known to write them all letters at one point or another. Her classroom deportment is not lacking in the least. On top of all that she has also developed a thirst for learning. She seems to enjoy school, and school, it appears, enjoys her
CRIME AND PUNISHMENT FOR WINONA RYDER
By Jerry Hinkle, Special to the Holabird Advocate
I hope dear Readers that one of you to the very least has the ear of the judge that is hearing the case of Ms Winona Ryder. I believe that Ms. Ryder, being a general menace to the public, needs guidance.
Also, because she is so hard up as to make it neccessary for her to steal $6000 worth of merchandise, she needs a job. I'm talking steady, dependable, and possibly well paying work. And for that reason, I believe that perhaps Ms. Ryder should be sentenced to be cast as my television wife in a show I hope to develop under the watchful brilliance of Mr. Sumner Redstone of Viacom. A show tentativly called "The Fat Guy and the Hot Wife".
Now, I know that Ms. Ryder is supposed to be a movie star, but let's face it, she hasn't had a hit movie since-er-since-well I'm sure she had one. See, the movies are just not dependable way to make a living. Besides, she has to pay for her crime. I'll make sure she does just that.Originally I was going to suggest that Ms. Ryder be locked up in my bedroom and whatever happens, happens. This idea was frowned upon by my family on the grounds that she hasn't commited murder.
Of course, the Viacom deal hasn't come through yet, but I expect to hear any day now from Mr. Redstone. It's also my hope that someone with Mr. Redstone's ear brings this to his attention. He and I both have a chance to help this poor misguided soul make something out of her life. I just need a chance. If she can't be my T.V. wife, perhaps she can be cast as the wacky neighbor. Think about it Your Honor, and get back to me as soon as possible.





Wednesday, November 06, 2002
 
VOL. I Issue 11F
JOHNSON WINS SENATE BY NARROW MARGIN
As Dan Rather might say "This race was tighter than a botox smile". When every last ballot was counted Senator Tim Johnson was ahead by a cool 528 votes. John Thune, who challenged him for the Senate seat, congratulated Johnson but did not concede. Because of the narrow margin of victory by state law it is mandatory that a recount takes place and will happen soon. The final official vote tally is as follows:
U.S. Senate
Candidate Percent Votes
Tim Johnson (D) 50% 167,477
John Thune (R) 49% 166,949
Kurt Evans (L) 1% 3,064
844 of 844 Precincts Reporting
SOCIETY:GEORGE KENNEDY CELEBRATES BIRTHDAY
Dining of pumpkin ala mode instead of cake, the Ponderosa had both Mary Hinkle and Mavis Kennedy cooking, each trying to outdo the other. Joyce left before dinner to go home and get some work done. Those who remained had to loosen their respective belts a notch or two. Some around the Ponderosa are hoping that, somewhere, somehow, Mike Soulek is having nearly as much fun on his birthday as they.
MILLET HARVEST TO HAPPEN
This afternoon Darrel Hinkle has arranged for custom harvestors to combine his millet and put it in the bin. It's been a long time in coming and a bone of contention with his father, Harold, for some time now. All of us here at the Holabird Advocate are hoping Darrel does well enough to keep Harold quite, even if just for a little while.




 
VOL. I Issue 11E
THUNE AHEAD OF JOHNSON IN SENATE RACE
With 99% of precincts reporting, John Thune is ahead of Incumbant Senator Johnson by about 1000 votes. Election Night coverage was as lively as possible, with computer problems here and there. Davidson County, in fact, blew a computer chip and could not count ballots until another chip could be driven in from Omaha, Nebraska. This Race is to close to call, because a possible mandatory recount takes place if the final result is within 690 votes. Nationally, the Republicans have control of the Senate. There are still three undecided elections are in Minnesota, Lousiana, and of course, South Dakota.
U.S. SENATE SOUTH DAKOTA
99% Reporting
THUNE R 166,193 50%
JOHNSON (I) D 165,115 49%
EVANS L 3,048 1%
JANKLOW WINS AS PROJECTED
The 64 year old William J. "Wild Bill" Janklow has won the lone U.S. House seat from challenger Stephanie Herseth, who while doing respectfully well for a Democrat, still lost by a few thousand votes. Janklow himself said "She'll have quite a career in South Dakota politics, just not now!"
U.S. HOUSE SOUTH DAKOTA
99% Reporting
JANKLOW R 178,977 54%
HERSETH D 151,397 45%
BEGAY L 3,087 1%
DISCUSSION LIVELY AT PONDEROSA
After E.E. Hinkle went to bed last night there was quite a debate brewing in his house. It got loud at times, but not enough for him to hear anything. As with most politicical discussions this one decided nothing and was over by bedtime






Tuesday, November 05, 2002
 
VOL. I Issue 11D
JANKLOW PROJECTED HOUSE WINNER OVER HERSETH
by Jerry Hinkle, Special to the Holabird Advocate
It appears that Stephanie Herseth will be packing grain buckets and openning gates for her dad this winter, as KELOLAND-TV has projected present Govenor Bill Janklow to be Representitive-elect Janklow. If Janklow does win, he will be sworn in on the first Monday of the new year in Washington D.C.
What does this mean for South Dakota? The current exodus of the state's young people will continue, perhaps at a faster rate than before. Eventually, I, the courageous, dynamic Publisher, will be the youngest person in South Dakota. That is, of course, unless Ms. Herseth decides to stay.
SENATE RACE TO CLOSE TO CALL
With about 1/3 of the vote in South Dakota counted, incumbant Tim Johnson has 52%. Nationally the Senate has 14 of 34 open seats, Democrats have 9 with 11 still open. Control of the Senate still hangs in the balance. When the final decision is made you the Reader can count on the Holabird Advocate to bring those results to you. Either late tonight or early this morning.




 
VOL. I Issue 11C
HAROLD HINKLE VACUMS LIVING ROOM
MARY PASSES OUT FROM THE SHOCK
With both of Harold Hinkle's sisters visiting tonight Mary wanted to get the living room cleaned. Harold had other ideas that involved fixing fence. Mary defrosted her father-in-law's freezer last night and stayed overnight at E.E.'s house. When got home the next morning she saw Harold with hewr precious Hooover in his hands. She didn't know just how to take that. When she came to, Mary was asked how he did. She said,"Not bad for a beginner".





Monday, November 04, 2002
 
VOL. I Issue 11B
ELECTION EVE BRINGS PREPARATION
As Election Day daws ever nearer, the entire nation gears up for another campaign. The ultimate poll will finally be taken. Important decisions are going to be made, for better or worse, at the voting both. Some are eagerly waiting to vote. Some vote while holding their nose. Others won't vote at all. For practice, you the Reader may want to vote in our mini-poll. All of us at the Holabird Advocate hope you vote "yes" and actually do go out and vote. It's a right and a responsibility. If a 100 year old man that can't hear good and walks around bent with a cane can vote, then you have no reason not to. Of Course, all of the Holabird Advocate Readers who have already answered the minipoll have siad they will vote, so no need to worry, right. After you do vote, let's hope and pray that the election clerk is going to let it count, as voter and election fraud is once again in the news.
MY BIG FAT LATIN APOLOGY TO SUMNER REDSTONE
by Jerry Hinkle, Special to the Holabird Advocate
Mea culpa, mea culpa, mea maxima culpa to you, Mr. Sumner Redstone. I am very humbled in the light of your genius. I have often said that I publish this newsblog with half my brain tied behind my back. My harsh words to you prove that I'm sure. But, Mr Redstone, if i had your brain I could do this newsblog with 90% of my brain tied behind my back. After Hearing that you canned that stinker "Bram and Alice", I knew things were heading in the right direction. Yes, Mr Redstone, you do indeed know what you are doing. I'm sorry I ever doubted you.
By the way Mr Redstone, I noticed that on you Monday night comedy lineup you have quite a few shows with grossly overweight fellows married to really hot chicks. Now I am not grossly overweight anymore, Mr. Redstone, but I can get that way if you can arrange a show for me with Khrystyne Haje from that show "Head of the Class" (she played Simone). I have seen a recent picture of her and can pretty much guarantee she's hot. As for my weight, like I said give me a while. Oh yeah, I can also be crude and obnoxious, just like the guys on your Monday night comedy lineup. It'll be a hit, Mr. Redstone, all this show needs is a title. I'll be waiting to hear from you Mr. Redstone, sir. Take your time. Think it over.





Friday, November 01, 2002
 
VOL. I Issue 11A
AS HOLABIRD ADVOCATE STARTS ELEVENTH ISSUE
SOME WILL THINGS CHANGE SOME THINGS WON'T
All of us at the Holabird Advocate are thrilled about the next issue. Our courageous, dynamic Publisher, Jerry Hinkle is still seeking perfection in this newsblog. He's keeping it fresh and trying to "keep it real". To that end he will be adding more features. "Poetry corner" will feature various poems by E.E. Hinkle, Zoe Maginnis, and will welcome submissions from Readers as well. The new mini-poll asks the question "Will you vote on Election Day?" This will run until Election Day, and then We'll run a poll to see how you, the Reader, rate the Holabird Advocate newsblog. We will also be starting a new feature called "South Dakota Songbook" which will feature songs and song parodies that are sure to liven up any gathering of friends and family.
Of course one thing that will stay the same is the sagatious opinions and wisdom that you've come to expect from our Publisher. Even those who disagree with him enjoy reading about what he thinks.
On December 1 the Holabird Advocate "Person of the Year" will be Revealed. Readers may submit their choices, but it's been said that this year's winner of that title may have already been selected. Any Readers will have to be pretty compeling to get our Publisher to change his mind.
STEPHANIE HERSETH OUTLINES ECONOMIC DEVELOPMENT
PLANS TO HELP KEEP YOUNG PEOPLE IN SOUTH DAKOTA
Stephanie Herseth has outlined her plans to help keep young people in South Dakota by creating economic opportunities and financial incentives for the next generation of South Dakotans to live, work and thrive here at home. With population loss in 73% of its counties, South Dakota is suffering high out-migration in its rural areas, making it more difficult for young people to find jobs and take root in the state. Herseth said: "I believe that in addition to urban renewal, Congress should focus legislation on rural renewal, to preserve the quality of life we enjoy in rural America. The federal government can play an important role in creating incentives for young people to stay in our cities and towns of all sizes. We can do this by providing low-interest loans to help new families get started; forgiving student loans for doctors and teachers and other professionals willing to serve in rural areas; and targeting investments and economic development in rural America."
Herseth highlighted several initiatives, including some proposed in the New Homestead Act, to help keep our young people here at home:
" Forgiveness of college loans for recent graduates who live and work in rural areas for 5 years.
" Tax incentives for investment in value-added agriculture, allowing producers to diversify operations.
" Tax credits for home purchases in rural areas.
" Home value protection, allowing losses in value to homes in rural areas to be deducted from federal income taxes.
" Rural investment tax credits to encourage investment in rural areas.
" Increased telecom infrastructure.
" Accelerated depreciation for businesses' equipment purchases.
" More accessible and affordable child care for young families.
Herseth continued, "One of the main reasons I'm running for Congress is because I want to help create economic opportunities and incentives for our young people to stay in South Dakota. In Congress, I would support legislation, like the New Homestead Act, that does just that, as I work to preserve the quality of life we hold dear in South Dakota and throughout rural America."
THE IGNORANT ARE WINNING-SO FAR
by Jerry Hinkle, Special to the
Holabird Advocate
I'm broad minded as most things go, but I just can't believe this "dance craze" that is supposedly sweeping the nation. Have you heard of "The Ketchup Dance"? Well, if not believe me, ya'll ain't missin' much. How can this be called a dance when everything but the feet are moving? Oh sure, the group of young ladies that started this are putting on quite a fine show in more ways than one. But does anybody who comes to a barn dance in Holabird want to see ol' Widow Dallor or Bertha Krupt shaking there grove thing like that? I don't think so.
I saw it on "The Early Show" this morning. That should've been my first clue thatthe dance was lame. This latest attempt by CBS has really stunk up the television airwaves. If not for the very bald Hairy-er-Harry Smith this would be another "View". (which really would suck). This is the biggest mistake CBS has made since they canceled "Captain Kangaroo" to expand the morning news from one hour to two hours. I really wonder where the Tiffany Network's head is at. To think Sumner Redstone has let CBS do some of the stupid things they've done lately. Mr. Redstone, please, please, in the name of all that's decent get rid of the morons you have running CBS and get someone at least 10% as smart as you are yourself. A man that can turn a chain of drive-in theaters into a billion dollar media empire can surely get rid of the crap foisted on us by your underlings. Don't make me shut of my TV Mr. Redstone. I may not turn it on again.




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