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 Holabird AdvocateProviding all the news we see fit to print since 2002!Monday, November 04, 2002 VOL. I Issue 11B ELECTION EVE BRINGS PREPARATION As Election Day daws ever nearer, the entire nation gears up for another campaign. The ultimate poll will finally be taken. Important decisions are going to be made, for better or worse, at the voting both. Some are eagerly waiting to vote. Some vote while holding their nose. Others won't vote at all. For practice, you the Reader may want to vote in our mini-poll. All of us at the Holabird Advocate hope you vote "yes" and actually do go out and vote. It's a right and a responsibility. If a 100 year old man that can't hear good and walks around bent with a cane can vote, then you have no reason not to. Of Course, all of the Holabird Advocate Readers who have already answered the minipoll have siad they will vote, so no need to worry, right. After you do vote, let's hope and pray that the election clerk is going to let it count, as voter and election fraud is once again in the news. MY BIG FAT LATIN APOLOGY TO SUMNER REDSTONE by Jerry Hinkle, Special to the Holabird Advocate Mea culpa, mea culpa, mea maxima culpa to you, Mr. Sumner Redstone. I am very humbled in the light of your genius. I have often said that I publish this newsblog with half my brain tied behind my back. My harsh words to you prove that I'm sure. But, Mr Redstone, if i had your brain I could do this newsblog with 90% of my brain tied behind my back. After Hearing that you canned that stinker "Bram and Alice", I knew things were heading in the right direction. Yes, Mr Redstone, you do indeed know what you are doing. I'm sorry I ever doubted you. By the way Mr Redstone, I noticed that on you Monday night comedy lineup you have quite a few shows with grossly overweight fellows married to really hot chicks. Now I am not grossly overweight anymore, Mr. Redstone, but I can get that way if you can arrange a show for me with Khrystyne Haje from that show "Head of the Class" (she played Simone). I have seen a recent picture of her and can pretty much guarantee she's hot. As for my weight, like I said give me a while. Oh yeah, I can also be crude and obnoxious, just like the guys on your Monday night comedy lineup. It'll be a hit, Mr. Redstone, all this show needs is a title. I'll be waiting to hear from you Mr. Redstone, sir. Take your time. Think it over.
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