A lot of men are a little vague on exactly when middle age begins. It has nothing to do with your chronological age, and it doesn't matter if your hair has gone gray, white or AWOL. You have officially arrived at midlife when the most important aspect of any given activity is comfort. In midlife, excitement, adventure and even finances all take a back seat. What you're looking for is comfort. You're not interested in physical fitness, you want heating and air conditioning. You want padding -- on your furniture, on your paycheck and on your own butt. Even your love life is affected. Forget passion, what you want now is a "comfortable" relationship, where nobody yells at anybody, nothing changes and nine times out of 10 you fall asleep before your wife does. Your wild oats have turned to Wild Oat-Bran. As middle age progresses, you'll probably even become "comfortable" with yourself. Some call it giving up. I call it true success. When you can stand in front of a mirror or a banker and say proudly 'This is as good as I get,' hey, that has to be a comforting thought.

When I first came to DWU, I was nobody. I was just an old fat guy from some wide spot on the road called Holabird that few ever heard about, and fewer even cared about, but something happened. Koinonia helped me to get to know my fellow students, and vice verse. Koinonia is Greek for Togetherness, or possibly Communion. It is a time of fellowship and sharing a meal that helps us not only put behind the pressure as students we feel during the week, but it helps us get to know each other, not only as people, but as children of God. Apart from koinonia, I randomly met (or so it would seem in a worldly POV) a young man named Colin Duffy, who eventually became known as my Rebel Son. He and his lady friend Jessica could have just as easily washed both hands of me, but for some reason we have managed to become almost nearly just about family. I think the world of both of them. We've not always seen eye to eye on things, we get on each others nerves, but we still keep our lines of communication open. If only my biological family could do that!

The bottom line is that when you let love and understanding into your heart and life, you can change the world in ways both big and small. Sometimes all it takes is a little bread and wine, a beer at the White House, a common meal, or even a little Captain Morgan, to bring the thing about. DWU President Dr. Duffet has promised that when he's not busy he's going to have a drink with me at Java City so we can talk about things. It hasn't happened yet, but I know his heart is in the right place. The best thing about drinking is that is keeps your hand to full to make a fist!