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 Holabird AdvocateProviding all the news we see fit to print since 2002!Friday, May 31, 2002 VOL. I Issue 5F CAR WRECK DELAYS REHERSALS FOR "A GOOD LAND" The Hyde County Historical Society's production of "A Good Land" has been delayed because of an accidental car wreck on a Hyde County road.14 year old Brittany Kerr was driving alone from her house to her grandparent's when she hit loose gravel.She was taken to Sioux Falls where at last report she had internal bleeding and a thrice fractured pelvic bone among other things.Ms. Kerr was to play one of the children in the production.In the hospital with her are her mother, Kathy Kerr, and her Aunt, Peg Fausett.The play's Director,Barbara Nemec,delayed rehersal until until further notice.All of us at The Holabird Advocate send our best wishes to the Kerr family. PETA MEETING FESTIVE The first of many meetings of PETA(People Eating Tasty Animals)was fun for everyone.The meeting was held Monday because of scheduling conflicts.A rehersal of the meeting was held on Sunday with Diane Hoffman and friend Harry of Faulkton,South Dakota.Brats provided by Diane and Harry were grilled.Cooking was handled masterfully by Harold Hinkle.Diane also baked a Banana Nut cake(a favorite of E.E. Hinkle's).A reluctant guest at first was E.E. Hinkle,but he was eventually convinced to join the group. At the actual meeting an Monday several of the children had to be told that this wasn't Burger King(i.e.,they couldn't "have it" their way)Kaitlyn Pothast requested a frozen chicken TV dinner instead of hamburgers and hot dogs.Other more reasonable requests,such as BBQ sauce and cheeseburgers were honored. E.E. HINKLE SAVES THE DAY A few of the Ponderosa's bulls escaped their pen Tuesday morning.Jerry and E.E Hinkle successfuly guided them back into the feedlot because it happens so fast there was no time to think(not that anyone on the Ponderosa ever does).E.E. was instramental in capturing the beasts by speaking softly and carrying a big stick,not unlike a young Teddy Roosevelt.It was fortunate that he had his cane along when he went for that walk.Jerry's contribution was mostly openning the gate and looking surprised. PSYCHIC PREDICTS HERSETH HEADED FOR HOUSE by Jerry Hinkle,Special to The Holabird Advocate Claire Voyant,the new official psychic for The Holabird Advocate,Predicts that not only will Stephanie Herseth be nominated,she will be elected to the U.S. House of Representitives. Ms. Voyant's previous predictions have not been 100% but she has been right on the money lately.In the past she predicted that Bernie Hunhoff would be elected Govenor in 1998(she was wrong).Everything she has so far this year predicted has materialized.Those being Chandra Levy being found,Madonna shocking and disgusting the American public(she makes that one every year,hasn't been wrong once)and correctly predicting the Survivor 4 winner.All of us at The Holabird Advocate believe that Ms. Herseth is the best and most qualified candidate.I am very hopeful that she will hand Bill Janklow an election defeat.It would be a first if it happens.This won't be easy,because for some reason Republicans seem to get a free pass in this state.How else do you explain Bill Janklow's getting elected to the Office of Govenor 4 times despite his lack of intelligence,integrity, or just plain good sense.Ms. Herseth has an approachable quality that makes her come across as a caring individual.Quite a smart lady as well.She is also more attractive than Bill Janklow.There are two ways for women to succeed in anything.You can either scare people stupid like Hillary Clinton or you could be so polite that people just want to please you,just like Stephanie Herseth.Remember to get out and vote on June 4th. Friday, May 24, 2002 VOL. I Issue 5E MAI MAI MAI:BABY G IS BORN Evelyn Mai Geitzenauer peeked out into the world this morning.Proud parents are Greg and Susan Geitzenauer.Evelyn is their second child who will join big sister Claire at home.She tipped the scale at 9lbs 11oz.(and Susan never cussed at all during the delivery,what a trooper).Evelyn was a week past due,which caused some of us here to wonder if she had been born on the 17th perhaps she'd have been named Syttende Mai. HAROLD HINKLE GETS TEETH FOR HIS BIRTHDAY It wasn't much of a happy birthday for Harold Hinkle as he had a dental appointment on that afternoon.The dentist filled in his cavities and he will go back in a week for a follow-up visit.At least he doesn't have to wear dentures and put them in a glass like his poor long suffering wife. REHERSALS FOR "A GOOD LAND" TO BEGIN TUESDAY The first read-through for "A Good Land" was yesterday.With a few parts yet to be cast rehersal is to start Tuesday May 28.The play,written and directed by Holabird author, cultural expert, and society maven,Barbara Nemec, is the tale of 4 generations of women who settled in a Dakota Territory (later South Dakota) homestead. The play came to the author in a dream and some of the scenes were based on her own and her family's experiences.Performances will be on the 16th and 17th of August.The performace on the 16th is to be a dinner theater. PETA TO MEET AT PONDEROSA ON SUNDAY The first meeting of PETA(People Eating Tasty Animals) will be held at the Ponderosa for a picnic over the Memorial holiday weekend.Grilling will be the order of the day as hamburgers and hotdogs are the feature attraction.Singing, dancing and fun will soon follow.If you want to join this group you're more than welcome,just call ahead or you'll go hungry.If you want to start your own PETA chapter,simply grill some form of dead animal,eat and enjoy. A SEPTEMBER 11 HOLIDAY,I SAY "NO WAY!!!" by Jerry Hinkle,special to the Holabird Advocate There has been talk of making September 11th a federal holiday.The talk has died down some,but there still is talk.I am not in favor of that.Does this mean I'm not sensitive to the tragedy that unfolded that morning?NO!!! I feel as bad about what happenned as just about everyone else out there does.A federal holiday is just not neccessary.If you want to remember that day,remember it.We as a nation have had several tragedies befall us in the past.Pearl Harbor, JFK's death,the Space Shuttle explosion,and yes September 11th are among the most recent.None of these sad events that I've related have been given a federal holiday.They are observed by the people who wish to observe them in their own way.We don't need the federal government to tell us on what days to cry for the dead.Or do we?God help us if we do.Memorial Day was called Decoration day when it first started.The graves of the "Glorious Dead" in the Civil War were decorated by the ladies to honor those soldiers who died for their country and their freedom.If we honor, truly honor, those who died for their country on that day that would include all the people who died on all of the other events mentioned here.The original purpose of Memorial Day seems lost in this modern age we live in.Instead of honoring the memory of our friends, family, and heroes we "eat tasty animals".So after all the tasy animals are eaten, give thought to those who went on before you and me and be greatful.They left us a great legacy.Are we so lazy that we need another paid day off from work to remember it.I don't thinks so.If you dis-agree feel free to let me know. Tuesday, May 14, 2002 VOL. I Issue 5D MOTHERS DAY SURPRISE FOR AGNES HAHN It was a very special mothers day for Agnes Hahn when she recieved a new grill just in time for the summer barbeque season.It was raining too much for her to use it outside Saturday,so it was put in the garage so that it could be used.Gene Goehring,Agnes's youngest son,showed her how it works.Both dinner at noon and supper that night were prepared on the grill.As usual there was leftovers.Everyone agreed that the garage smelled so good because of the wonderful aromas in air. SOCIETY:SAMANTHA HOFFMAN TURNS 2 Ken and Amy Hoffman hosted a party to celebrate the second birthday of their daughter Samantha at their home in Highmore.Among the presents given to her was a Shetland pony that scared her.Her cousin,Brittany Hinkle broke it in for her.She also recieved a shovel and pail suitable for use on the beach. CORRECTION by Jerry Hinkle not so Special to The Holabird Advocate Well,it was bound to happen sooner or later.I,your courageous,dymamic Publisher made a mistake.In the previous edition of The Holabird Advocate, I said the there was no profanity on "The Mary Tyler Moore Show".On the reunion show that aired on CBS last night,I and all who watched clearly heard the word "Damn" which was spoken by Georgia Engel as Georgette Franklin.Although the mistake was not really so dynamic it would not have been courageous of me not to correct it.We'll just say there was a little profanity.Everything else was right on the money as far as I can remember.It has been 25 years since I saw a whole episode of that show.My memory is not what it used to be I guess. Thursday, May 09, 2002 VOL. I Issue 5C DOCTOR TO E.E. HINKLE:DON'T COME BACK UNTIL AUGUST At his latest doctor's appointment E.E Hinkle was told that his blood presure was normal and that he need not come back until sometime in August,when he will be well on his way to 101.He is to still avoid salt,but his grandson jerry said that if he wants salt after his 100th birthday,he will get it.Until that day it's salt free bacon for breakfast. JERRY HINKLE TO BE IN "A GOOD LAND" Our courageous,dynamic Publisher,Jerry Hinkle was asked to be in the Hyde County Historical and Genelogical Society's production of "The Good Land",a play written by Barbera Nemec,Holabird's maven of style and good taste.Jerry will play the small but pivital role of a minister.Mrs. Nemec,who will also direct the production,had to do a little convincing,to get him to agree to perform,but won him over as she would not take "No" for an answer.The performance of this musical production will take place sometime in mid August. SHE MADE IT AFTER ALL by Jerry Hinkle,Special to The Holabird Advocate Mary Tyler Moore went to the place where it all began to see the statue placed by cable's TV-Land depicting her as Mary Richards at that magical moment when she tosed her hat into the air in the openning credits of "The Mary Tyler Moore Show".That show was groundbreaking at the time with it's portrayal of a single woman in her 30s making it on her own.Not the usual TV fare of the 1970s.It was the real "Must see TV " as opposed to the"Please Watch TV" crap that we are forced to watch today.I sometimes wonder how it would stack up in today's primetime network line-up.After all there was no profanity,very little bed-hopping,but worst of all,with the exception of Lisa Gerritsen, Helen Hunt and Robbie Rist there was nobody under 30 in the cast.Still,being "out of date" didn't effect the turnout at the unveiling ceremony as thousands showed up to see the statue and sing the theme song which was masterfully written and performed by former Cricket,Sonny Curtis.The only question I have is"how did the sculptor get that hat to stay in mid-air?".I guess I'll have to go see the statue myself.If only I knew somebody in the Twin Cities who could show me where it is. Wednesday, May 08, 2002 VOL. I Issue 5B A TRIP TO THE DOCTOR Tuesday morning Harold,Mary,and Jerry Hinkle went to Pierre to keep Doctor appointments.Harold went to Dr.Linn for a check-up.Mary and Jerry saw Dr.Beemer the eye doctor in the afternoon.Jerry did not want to go as this would leave E.E. to fend for himself.He ended up going but he made Harold and Mary as miserable as possible. As it turned out,the old boy did pretty good on his own.It rained,sleeted,and hailed in Pierre at times during the day.There was about .20 of an inch of rain on the Ponderosa. Harold will have to wait for his results,but both Mary and Jerry found out that their eyesight has improved.Jerry had astigmatism before,but that's gone now. Mary is starting to develop cataracts on her eyes. DARREL HINKLE NO-TILLING THE CROP FOR 2002 Not wanting to be left behind in planting Darrel Hinkle went out to plant corn on Monday.He has decided to expermint with no-til oats and corn.using chemicals to control weeds instead.He is not the only operator to use this method but some inthe family are viewing this project skeptically.The rain on Tuesday delayed him from completing the corn planting,but allowed him to continue with some mechanical work in the shop. TAMERA PETERSON CROWNED QUEEN E.E. Hinkle recieved word that his great-grandaughter Tamera(Tami)Peterson was elected Prom Queen at the High School this past weekend.Truly remarkable given that her mother is the Principal.It is not remarkable that she could be queen.Tami is tall,graceful,and almost as pretty as her mother .Tami is a graduating senior at Upton High School in Upton,Wyoming.She is also up for Valedictorian.If selected it is our hope here at The Holabird Advocate that she will send word to us and make sure the Editor of our fine newspaper spell it right.It's not known if she would be the 1st Valedictorian,but it is still an honor at any rate. MARY HINKLE KEEPS BUSY With the graduation season upon us,Mary Hinkle's plaque making business is busy and expected to be that way for the next month or so.Mavis Kennedy has recently asked if Jerry if Mary could use a little help with her other duties.This caught him by surprise as the last he heard Mavis was too busy doing her own thing.As for Mary,all of us at the Holabird Advocate predict she will be thrilled to have Mavis over.Whenever Mavis comes to the Ponderosa,Mary says it feels "Just like having a wife" because she cooks and helps clean up her father house and all that.Mary once observed that"It's kind of nice to have a wife".All of us at The Holabird Advocate agree that if anyone had to have a wife,Mavis would be an excellent choice. STEPHANIE HERSETH FOR U.S. REPRESENTITIVE by Jerry Hinkle,Special to The Holabird Advocate I,as Publisher of The Holabird Advocate have decided to endorse Stephanie Herseth in her bid for South Dakota's lone seat in the House of Representitives.She is a relative newcomer to South Dakota politics.By that I mean she's never ran for office but her relatives have.Her Grandfather,Ralph Herseth was elected Governor of South Dakota once and for a Democrat,that's really something.Her Grandmother Lorna was elected Secretary of State as well.Her father ran for Governor but was not elected.Of all the Democratic candidates running,she has been the most visable as far as T.V. coverage is concerned.Ms. Herseth was born and raised in this state and left it only to go to college and law school.after that she apparently has been working with her father on the Herseth ranch near Houghton,South Dakota after her law school graduation.That is, if I understand her advertisments correctly.My Republican Sister-in-Law said that of all the candidates she's seen,Stephanie Herseth is the most professional.as far as her chances for election,the 1st hurtle is the June primary,in which her only visable opposition is Rick Weiland,a man who ran for the office 8 years ago.He even moved to South Dakota from Denver just so he could run.After he lost that contest he was appointed FEMA Regional Director by Preident Bill Clinton and moved back to(guess where).He had that job until the current administration took over.Next thing you know,he moved back here from Denver to (guess what).This guy may be some moving company's preffered customer by now.My main reason for endorsing Ms. Herseth is because she is good looking.The same reason most women have voted for politicians for 82 years. There is one thing that does concern me however.Her Republican opposition is most likely to be none other than Govenor Bill Janklow,who for some reason unknown to me is really popular in these parts.Maybe Ms. Herseth knows that she can't win and is using her campaign commercials to attract a husband with her form-fitting sweaters.She got my attention,whether she wanted it or not. Thursday, May 02, 2002 VOL. I Issue 5A IT TAKES A VILLAGE TO RAISE A GREENHOUSE Kristi's Greenhouse,operated buy Kristi Hinkle is opened for the growing season.Several relatives and friends of her's helped her set it up on Monday.The plastic cover was rolled on early Tuesday morning as it was not too windy.Wednesday Darrel and Kristi picked up the inventory, leaving their children in the capable hands of Mary and Harold. THE CASE OF THE MISSING CANE E.E. Hinkle has been using a cane off and on for the past 5 months.Occasionally he leaves it somewhere and forgets to pick it up.Tuesday evening the cane came up missing once again.After several hours of searching turned up nothing,the old boy was waxing roth.Blaming his great grand-daughter,Brittany, for the disappearance,and even accusing an unknown "Somebody" of taking it to make him think he's crazy.The next morning he found it right where he left it. BREAKFAST AT THE PONDEROSA By Jerry Hinkle,Special to The Holabird Advocate With my mother busy with her grandkids and her woodcraft business in the graduation plaque season I have been making breakfast for my Granddad for the past few days and doing surprisingly well.He has a cast iron frying pan that I use to cook the bacon and egg.Cast iron was used long before the advent of Teflon.Chef Burt Wolf once said that since cast iron pans went "out of style",a lot of people have had to take Geritol or some other iron supplement. I doubt that my grandad has that problem. 
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