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Holabird Advocate

Providing all the news we see fit to print since 2002!


Wednesday, January 02, 2013
 

                                    Happy Belated Holidays

     All of us here at the Holabird Advocate are sorry that other things had forced us to close the home office yesterday on both New Years Day, and our own 11th Anniversary. We hope that every Reader out there enjoyed saying so long to 2012 and welcomed 2013 at the stroke midnight in a safe and legal manner. Our Publisher invited his Next door neighbor, Jane, to the Ramada, but she had to wash her hair. She must have washed it good, because she was a redhead, but the next morning she was a bleach blonde.
     The budget committee at Flexcor met this morning and approved the purchase of a video camera. If all goes well, which woulf kinda be a first around here, we'll be bringing back the "Jerry Hinkle Program' in video form, and sharing the website that way. Hopefully Warning Salsa will sponsor the show once the pilot is filmed and uploaded.

    

                     The Stranger submitted by Mary Hinkle

     A few years after I was born, my Dad met a stranger who was new to our small town. From the beginning, Dad was fascinated with this enchanting newcomer and soon invited him to live with our family. The stranger was quickly accepted and was around from then on. As I grew up, I never questioned his place in my family. In my young mind, he had a special niche. My parents were complementary instructors: Mom taught me good from evil, and Dad taught me to obey.
     But the stranger... he was our storyteller. He would keep us spellbound for hours on end with adventures, mysteries and comedies.If I wanted to know anything about politics, history or science, he always knew the answers about the past, understood the present and even seemed able to predict the future! He took my family to the first major league ball game. He made me laugh, and he made me cry. The stranger never stopped talking, but Dad didn't seem to mind.
     Sometimes, Mom would get up quietly while the rest of us were shushing each other to listen to what he had to say, and she would go to the kitchen for peace and quiet. (I wonder now if she ever prayed for the stranger to leave.)
     Dad ruled our household with certain moral convictions,but the stranger never felt obligated to honour them. Profanity, for example, was not allowed in our home - not from us, our friends or any visitors. Our long time visitor, however, got away with four-letter words that burned my ears and made my dad squirm and my mother blush. My Dad didn't permit the liberal use of alcohol but the stranger encouraged us to try it on a regular basis. He made cigarettes look cool, cigars manly, and pipes distinguished.
He talked freely (much too freely!) about sex. His comments were sometimes blatant, sometimes suggestive, and generally embarrassing.
     I now know that my early concepts about relationships were influenced strongly by the stranger. Time after time, he opposed the values of my parents, yet he was seldom rebuked ... And NEVER asked to leave.
     More than fifty years have passed since the stranger moved in with our family. He has blended right in and is not nearly as fascinating as he was at first. Still, if you could walk into my parents' den today, you would still find him sitting over in his corner, waiting for someone to listen to him talk and watch him draw his pictures.
     His name?.... We just call him 'TV.' He has a wife now....we call her 'Computer.' Their first child is "Cell Phone". Second child "I Pod " And JUST BORN THIS YEAR WAS a Grandchild: IPAD

Hugh Hefner Marries Third Wife

Playboy founder and owner, Hugh Heffner, married his third wife over the weekend. It's reported that the honeymoon for the 84 year old Hef and his much younger bride clocked in at under 4 hours, so no doctors had to be notified!




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