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Holabird Advocate

Providing all the news we see fit to print since 2002!

Wednesday, January 03, 2007
Looking For TaBitha
If you are a woman who would like to share your memories of TaB Cola back in the 70s, but you don't want anyone to know it's you, you're in luck. We are going to send an e-mail to anyone who would like to answer our query. A segment we're calling "Ten Questions with TaBitha". We will be picking out the answers we like best.
So far two women and one man have responded. The man, who we'll call "Troy" related that he used to amuse himself as a kid by pouring Coke on the sidewalk and swatting flies that gathered around (Ah! Sweet memories of childhood!). One day he grabbed a bottle of his mother's TaB by accident, and the flies wouldn't come. It could happen!
His Name is Lola?
Is He a Show cat?
Kristi Hinkle picked up a stray cat some time ago. It's a small cat and but as big around as Garfield. Kristi thought she could have babies any day now. The kids named the cat, an when that happens, you know that they'll never be able to part with it. Darrel Hinkle was worried about the impending delivery until he got a look at the cat. On closer examination, he discovered Lola was a Tomcat. The kids are still waiting for Lola to give birth, and Darrel seems content to let them wait for the blessed event.
A Treatment for Mad Cow?
Our Publisher was listening to "Agra Talk" on KGFX this morning when he heard that a South Dakota company called Hemotec may have found a treatment for BSE, commonly known as "Mad Cow Disease". All of us here at the Holabird Advocate hope this is so. Not because BSE is a problem in South Dakota, but because it would really stick it to that ignoramus Doprah Winbag.
In a totally unrelated story, there is still no cure for e coli in raw vegetables! It's a good day to be a PEDA member!
North of 40: The Balance of Nature
"You don't have to think fast if you move slow."
by Red Green
When you look back through history, there have been many examples of what I call the beauty and the beast syndrome. Cyrano de Bergerac, Quasimodo, Henry VIII, etc. I'm talking about the stories where a really ugly guy is going after a very beautiful woman. Now, at first it seems like a cruel twist of nature that ugly guys would be the most virile, but I don't see it that way. If you take a man and give him an over-active libido, and also make him good-looking, well, we all have a pretty good idea of what he's going to waste his life doing. So, in order for guys with overactive thyroids to lead productive lives where they make a contribution to society, nature makes them ugly. Women need to find them somewhat repulsive just so the men will be free to find jobs and join service clubs. On the complete opposite end of the scale, you have men with almost no interest in women. In order for them to have a chance to proliferate, nature makes them handsome. So, my theory on men is that the better-looking they are, the less virile they are. I'm not sure how scientific that opinion is. It may be largely based on me looking at my passport picture.

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