Holabird AdvocateProviding all the news we see fit to print since 2002!
Monday, August 04, 2003
VOL. II Issue 8B
PONDEROSA PINES HAS REVOLT
E.E. Hinkle was very upset about the .45" of rain that came down early this morning. It seems that there is a leak somewhere on the roof of the Ponderosa Pines Old Age Assistance Home. The 101 year old E.E. raised such a fuss about it that Harold Hinkle finally went on the roof and claimed to fix the leak. We won't know if the leak is plugged until the next rain occurs. Who knows when that'll happen.
WEST NILE VIRUS INFECTS TWO IN HYDE COUNTY
It has come to the attention of the Holabird Advocate that there are two people in Hyde county that have tested positive for the West Nile Virus. Neither of these two people are from Holabird, so there's no reason to get excited about it just yet.
ANOTHER HEARING AID FAILURE FOR E.E. HINKLE
Harold Hinkle got the idea to get a Hearing aid device for his father, E.E., to use on the telephone. It was on sale at Radio Shack at the Pierre Mall for $11.99. When he got it home it was installed on E.E.'s phone. Some folks thought Harold was asking a lot for 101 year old ears. Joyce Ferris called her daughter, Sandy Soulek, and she talked to her grandfather for a while. He claimed he couldn't hear anything at first, but with some tweeking on Mary Hinkle's part, it is suspected that he hears better than he lets on. When Sandy asked if he could hear her, he said, "NO!". Nobody really believes that.
TOP TEN THINGS I'D LIKE TO ASK STEPHANIE HERSETH
by Jerry Hinkle, special to the Holabird Advocate
As most of you wll knoiw, I have never met Stephanie Herseth. There has been much speculation on what I would do or what would happen should I have the chance to meet her. To that end, I have compiled a list. SO FROM THE HOME OFFICE IN HOLABIRD, S.D., HERE ARE THE TOP 10 THINGS I, JERRY HINKLE, YOUR COURAGEOUS, DYNAMIC PUBLISHER WOULD LIKE TO ASK STEPHANIE HERSETH GIVEN THE CHANCE:
1. Are you really a Mensa Member?
2. Have you raised that $2 million for the Farmers Union Foundation yet?
3. Do you know the FFA creed?
4. If so, could you please recite it?
5. What denominational church do you attend?
6. Do you use ethanol?
7. Would you like to learn how else to imrove your automotive milage?
8. Would you like to meet a 101 year old Democrat?
9. How did it feel to have yourself and Bill Janklow refered to as "Beauty and the Beast"?
10. Can you tell that I've lost 60 lbs. in the last year?
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