Holabird AdvocateProviding all the news we see fit to print since 2002!
Tuesday, December 17, 2002
VOL. I Issue 12E
HINKLES MAKING HAWAII PLANS
Harold and Mary Hinkle are starting to plan for their expected trip to Hawaii. Their departure date, interestingly enough is January 8th, Elvis's birthday (airports will be open on that day, go figure). So, if they do in fact go, they will spend Elvismas in "Blue Hawaii".
Agnes Hahn got the "A-OK" from her doctor (A for Aloha, one assumes) so she will be going as well. In fact he wanted her to take him along with her.
Mary arranged for Joyce Ferris to come over for that two week period to babysit Jerry and E.E. Hinkle ( they being too stupid to look after themselves and all). It is certain that she'll have vegetables with her when she comes. and as for the wild women, forget about it.
CHRISTMAS COMES EARLY FOR THE HINKLES
A couple of early Christmas presents have been opened at the Ponderosa. The first was a Grill 'n Cook, a George Foreman Grill knockoff, for Jerry Hinkle that was one-fifth the price of a Foreman. The Second was a Sauder china cabinet for Mary Hinkle. Sources say the cabinet was very heavy. Heavy enough to be made of oak, but for some reason cost was not disclosed.
The Hinkles will be celebrating Christmas early as well. Their gift exchange will be on December 22nd. They will have a cake for Noel Pothast's birthday which is the 23rd.
SOUTH DAKOTA SONGBOOK
Here's another Gordy Pratt Christmas song for you, the Reader. The tune is "Jingle Bells"
SANTA'S FINE HE'S ONLINE
Back in olden days the kids all made a list
of all the things they want and mail it of to old St. Nick.
In this computer age, the written letter's dead.
The kids all run computers and e-mail him instead.
Oh Santa's fine, He's online.
booting up his ROM.
Don't forget his new address
He knows if you've been bad, so be good for goodness sake.
Santa now keeps track of it on his new database.
The elves are obsolete, production is too hard.
He orders toys from QVC and pays with Master Card.
Santa's one big fear, it could happen in a flash.
his computer screen goes blank, the hard drive does a crash.
The message on the screen says retry or abort.
It's Christmas Eve, he's on the Phone with Gateway Tech Suport
(repeat chorus until sick of singing it)
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