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Holabird Advocate

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Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Not too long ago as I was leaving the library, walking on the sidewalk, minding my own business, my rebel son and daughter in law (adopted, of course, as I'm unable to have children) pulled up in their new car, A Cooper, a fine piece of Irish craftsmanship if there ever was one. To celebrate this new addition to the family, they invited me to a drinking establishment in my neighborhood, I've forgotten the name, but it will come to me after a spell. After getting home, doing my 3S routine, and falling asleep in the bathtub, I made it to this drinking establishment to find my rebel daughter in law sans her common law husband. It appears that he had to take "a friend" to the Kongo Klub, an establishment that have not experienced, so I don't know for myself if any drinking takes place. I have heard stories that would make it appear as though other more unsavory things take place therein. I have heard that women so ugly that not even Bill Clinton wants to view them do unspeakable things in that place. Of course, I've never been there so we'll leave it at that before that becomes the next field trip on which the kids take me.Yet I am curious. Why would anyone go to so much trouble to see unattractive women do whatever it is they do? I mentioned Bill Clinton earlier. He had Jennifer Flowers, Monica Lewinsky, and Paula Jones, neither one of these women would be mistaken for a supermodel. Why did he do that? Well it could be because they catered to his ego. I know about as much about marriage to Hillary as I do about the Kongo Klub, but I can imagine she's no picnic.Bill isn't alone. Evangelist Jimmy Swaggart took a couple prostitutes to a motel, and I don't think he was holding a prayer meeting with them in there. Swaggarts own cousin, Mickey Gilley, who had a big country hit with "Don't the girls all get prettier at closing time?" couldn't believe how unattractive these women that as he put it "Jimmy wanted to have 'fellowship' with". actually were. But they served a purpose to him, whatever it was. Satan is tricky that way. He can take the most unappealing things and make God's children desire them above all else, even someone like me. There once was a young lady at DWU to whom I once said, "You look lovely today". When I saw how happy that made her, I made a point of doing that every time I saw her. She enjoyed my catering to her ego very much until one day she woke up one day and realized that it was me and I've not seen her since, and don't expect to ever see her again. Too bad, she is a neat person who I miss on a daily basis. Truth be told, she catered to my ego as well, but then she's not homely whereas I look like death on a cracker.My rebel son did make it back from there. What we talked about will be another story for another time.

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