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Holabird Advocate

Providing all the news we see fit to print since 2002!

Tuesday, June 26, 2007
Dog Daze Of Summer
The canine population in the Alpena area just may be increasing by 1 in the next few days. Shannon Walls has reported that her family is planning to come up to the Kutz Kennel on the edge of Highmore to pick up a new little friend. Shannon is hoping that our Publisher will be able to meet them somewhere in Highmore when they do come over. He is 45% sure that such a meeting could take place.
Dog Daze leads to Dog's Life
Dianne Macek ran into a little snag last week. She had to take her husband, Harold Macek to the Mayo Clinic for a good once over, but had nobody to look after her dog. That's where the Reverend Jerry Hinkle comes in. When he was asked to help out, he wasn't too keen on the idea, but he knew that when Jesus said "take care of my sheep" he had something like this in mind. Jerry has certainly had a lot of help in the task, both on Earth and from Above. The dog has adapted to country living quickly. She enjoys going in the pickup to feed the bulls and getting the mail. The one down side is that she and Bob Cat are having a little territorial dispute. It looks like a draw right now, but Bob will win when the dog goes home, which should be any day now.
Barber Needs Haircut
Mary Hinkle gives pretty much all of the haircuts on the Ponderosa. But having a dog around must have given Mary the idea that she is getting shaggy. Her oldest son, Jerry Hinkle, still mad about the last haircut he was given, told her all he needed was a pair of scissors and a jar of her "jelly" and her could do to her hair what she did to his. It seems that Mary went a little wild with the scissors and cut into both of his ears and poked one eye. All of us here at the Holabird Advocate think that Jerry should lighten up! After all, John Edwards pays upwards of $400 for the exact same treatment.
Mary keeps saying she needs to get an hair appointment, but does nothing about it. Hopefully she will get one for Thursday since the Hinkles will be going into the church picnic that evening. If not, well, Jerry still has those scissors!
Readers Want to Wait and See
A very decisive 73% of the Readers of The Holabird Advocate believe that we should wait a while before we pray for more rain. There are 9% who have stopped praying for rain altogether, while the rest think we should still be praying for rain. The relative humidity at the Ponderosa is 36%. We don't know what that means, but thought it might be hady to know that.

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