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Holabird Advocate

Providing all the news we see fit to print since 2002!

Wednesday, May 16, 2007
Falwell Ends Well
Rev Jerry Falwell died earlier this week at age 73. Brother Jerry as our Publisher called him was a source of alternating inspiration and humor throughout the 80s and 90s. Whether you loved him or hated him, one had to admit he was colorful. It should be noted that some years after he lost his lawsuit against Larry Flint, that the Hustler Publisher became a member of Falwell's church.
Falwell ministry was supposedly worth $300 Million after the takeover of Jim and Tammy Baker's PTL Ministries. He garnered a lot of press for doing a belly flop at PTL's Heritage Valley after paying off the debt
Just in Time for $3.24 Gas
Kristi Hinkle reports that gasoline in Highmore has gone up to $3.24. What a great time for a road trip. Harold And Mary Hinkle are going to Wyoming in about 10 days. As it happens, the average price of gas in Wyoming is $3.03, which just happens to be the lowest reported price in the country. Seems like a long way to get cheap gas.
Jerry Hinkle's road trip to Harrold will be shorter. Peg Zilverberg reports that life has been hectic for them as well. Even at that they will be very glad to see Jerry at mass in Harrold. She has informed him that the Cathelic Church is in the southwest corner of Harrold.
Also making an appearance will be Cody and Wesley Zilverberg. They will be visiting for a month. Sometime after Kevin is ordinated he is to begin as the new parish assignment is to Holy Spirit Parish in Sioux Falls.
North of 40: 'Best before...'
by Red Green
Wives tend to be extra sensitive about germs and bacteria and any unseen microorganisms that can hurt their family members. If a perfectly good T-bone steak gets a little paint on it, or a handful of mashed potatoes drops onto a gravel driveway, they quickly scoop them up and throw them into the trash. Men are much more resilient. If food is relatively chewable and more or less in the same range of color it started out in, they'll eat it. And they'll eat it quickly, before their wives confiscate it. Many wives are food police. Many husbands are repeat offenders. And the biggest law that separates the two sides is the "Best Before" date. How many tons of perfectly good food have been thrown out by a food cop just because it reached an arbitrary date, stuck on there by some marketing genius who realizes that once it expires, you'll need to buy more. Whenever you see a man in the middle of the night, sitting alone in a chair with the fridge door open eating everything in sight, you know that tomorrow is "Best Before" day.

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