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Holabird Advocate

Providing all the news we see fit to print since 2002!

Wednesday, March 07, 2007

March: A Time to Pledge
SDPB is asking for pledges of financial support once again. We've been so busy watching Public TV these days we've barely noticed that most of the snow we got last weekend has already melted around Holabird. It is truly amazing what one can get for just $40/year From this valuable institution. Some may claim that Public Broadcasting has a liberal bias. All of us here at the Holabird Advocate believe that whoever says that has never sat through an episode of The McLaughlin Group, or a two hour Lawrence Welk Pledge Break Special. Harold Hinkle calls it "Educational TV". In a way, he's right. Last night Daniel O' Donnell was live in the SDPB Studio in Vermilion. He learned quite a bit about this part of the world. It seems Mr. O'Donnell was unaware of both Wall Drug and the Jackalope. If they can teach a grown man like him valuable information like that, imagine what they can teach children of all ages in South Dakota. Best of all is that Great Philosopher, Red Green, who once said, "If Public TV is School, then The Red Green Show is recess".
Get Me Off the Couch on Time
by Jerry Hinkle, courageous, dynamic
Publisher of the Holabird Advocate
So much TV, so little time! Hallmark is free this month. That means two hours of The Waltons a day, and two hours of Colombo a week until April. I have also discovered Kung Fu on the ION Channel. My brother Darrel had the lunchbox, but I doubt any of us boys watched this on the tube growing up. Nice show! Not as violent as I thought it would be. Who'd have thunk it? A Western hero from the East who doesn't want to fight. Todd Epp should forget Buddha and bone up on Master Kane.
Speaking of Mr. Epp (we really weren't, but he figures into this a good deal) he helped give me two hours of my life I'd have never gotten back if I'd watched that dreadful Tomb of Jesus crap on the Discovery Channel. Next thing James Cameron will tell us is that Jack Dawson and Rose were real too! PLEASE!!!!! The Gang at the Possum Lodge is more believable that that stuff!
Speaking of which:
North of 40:Keeping Trim
Red Green
I spend most of the winter in Florida. I'm not bragging, I just want to add credibility to my next piece of advice. Old guys should have short hair. There is nothing masculine or artistically whimsical about straggly wisps of curly white hair framing a wrinkle farm. Even if your hair is thick, you must keep it short. Generally, your hair looks older than you are, so letting it proportionately dominate your appearance will make you seem even more ancient than you deserve. When you're 18, maybe it looks good to see long, unkempt hair as a sign that you're just starting out. But at 60, you're not starting out, you're finishing up. And presenting yourself as "struggling" at that age does not enhance your overall image. So if you're an older guy, get your hair cut as often as you can. If you're cheap, get your wife to do it. Just make sure she has her glasses on and she's in a good mood.

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