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 Holabird AdvocateProviding all the news we see fit to print since 2002!Monday, December 15, 2003 VOL. II Issue 12L SADDAM CAPTURED OVER WEEKEND At about 11:30am, Holabird time, Saddam Hussien was captured by the 4th Armored division of the United States Army. Confirmation of this did not come through the regular channels until Sunday morning. It was reported that although Saddam was found in an 8 foot deep hole with a couple of automatic pistols and an AK-47 assult rifle, he preffered to try to did his way in deeper. Pentagon sources say that Saddam has been more talkitive than any other Iraqi soldier in custody yet, even though the only torture device in their area is the movie "Swept Away". It has been mentioned that a big story like this could have been "phoned in" to the Holabird Advocate had they put Audblog in place, something that the Publisher is taking into consideration at this time. CLAIRE VOYANT PROVEN WRONG-THIS TIME Chapter 13 of the 8th "Survivor" saga revealed that "Sassy Sandra" was the winner instead of the evil Jonny Fairplay. It was previously reported in the Holabird Advocate that Psychic Claire Voyant had visions of Mr. Fairplay as the winner. So disturbed by this was Ms. Voyant, that she went into hiding someplace where there is no television set. She'll come out of hiding when she is ready. At least her annual Madonna prediction was right on the money. HINKLES GET READY TO RETURN GRANDKID After a weekend of turmoil and strife, Harold and Mary Hinkle are getting ready to get Cade back to his parents sometime today. It hasn't been all bad, but he has been a challenge for them. His most notable trick is turning lights off and on. He is also fond of openning doors to let in the cold. In a few hours, all that will be behind them-for a little while. His allergies did not pose a problem to them at all, but they had treatments for them, just in case. Jerry's biggest problem with Cade was calling him "Justin" all the time, while Cade's great-grandfather, E.E. Hinkle kept trying to get him to shake hands.
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