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 Holabird AdvocateProviding all the news we see fit to print since 2002!Wednesday, January 08, 2003 VOL. II Issue 1F HOLABIRD ADVOCATE TO ALL: "HAPPY ELVISMAS" Today we celebrate the wonder that is Elvis on this, his birthday. He would have been 68 years old. Of course, there are those who claim he is alive. No matter because his music lives on. The very ignorant Harry Smith has compared Eminem to Elvis. They couldn't be more different. In the first place, Elvis made people happy with his music. Eminem's "music" is so bad that when he performs on TV, his words are edited on the 5 second delay or even bleeped altogether. Elvis may have been filmed from the waist up, but his words were never altered. Elvis put out a gospel record that earned his one, and so far only Grammy Award. Do you see a gospel album is Eminem's future? NOT A CHANCE!!! The most important difference is that Elvis made a comeback, and is rumored to still be alive somewhere. Eminem is gonna get killed someday, and they gonna make sure that boy is dead when they do it. HAROLD HINKLE IS NOT TOO OLD TO LEARN After a particularly trying day of babysitting his 5 year old granddaughter, Brittany, who was being quite naughty in his way of thinking, Harold Hinkle said to her."If you're going to be this naughty all the time, Grandpa's going to have to learn how to spank you". She looked him right in the eye and said, "I can teach you. It's not that hard." MIKE ROUNDS SIGNS OATH OF OFFICE Mike Rounds is now Govenor Mike Rounds. He signed his oath of office at the same time Bill Janklow took his oath in Washington. Rather than let Carole Hilliard be the first female Govenor in the state for the next four days, Janklow, being the woman hater he is, let Rounds do what he himself did 8 years ago. Some may remember that Janklow took his oath in secret, and for a few days, Constitutionally anyway, we had 2 Govenors. Govenors Rounds has a man sized job ahead of him. Janklow left the state of South Dakota in a great big mess finance wise. Rounds and the Legislative body must deal with a multi-million dollar budget shortfall. The fact that "the terrorists" won't get us is small consolation. All of us at the Holabird Advocate, with certain reservations, are going to support Gov. Rounds and pray that he does well in dealing with the state's problems for the next 4 years. With Janklow, we never had a prayer, or so it seems. MR JANKLOW GOES TO WASHINGTON:AT A THEATER NEAR YOU by Jerry Hinkle, Special to the Holabird Advocate Bill Janklow was the Kingfish in the state of South Dakota. Love him, or hate him that you had to admit that was true. Now he's 1 person of 435. Only 1 of 52 freshman Representives. A small fish in the ocean that is Washington, D.C. to be sure. One thing in his favor is that it's mostly Republicans. Other than that he's screwed, basicly. He may play the system to South Dakota's advantage. A great deal of the new Congresspersons are millionaires, just like Janklow. The issues they vote on could conflict. They are used to voting themselves a pay raise, now they may vote themselves a tax cut. A lot of Congress members are invested in oil and drug company stocks. Can we be sure they are looking out for us, who have no such stock. Democrats are worried that W's tax cut plan will put us further in debt. Conservative radio talks show host Rush Limbaugh says that it's not the tax cuts , but the Democrat's runaway spending. Mr Limbaugh seems to have forgotten that the Congress, which Constitutionally holds the "purse strings"is controlled by Republicans now. Let's hope they know what they're doing. This could be a long two years for you and me.
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